Toy Story and Loneliness: Why Connection Keeps Us Alive

WEBVTT

00:00:00.880 --> 00:00:04.900
Welcome to Yes And Land, where we say yes to

00:00:04.900 --> 00:00:08.339
the reality of yesterday and today, and we say

00:00:08.339 --> 00:00:12.380
and to the possibility, growth, and imagination

00:00:12.380 --> 00:00:22.620
of tomorrow. In 2023, United States Surgeon General

00:00:22.620 --> 00:00:25.820
Vivek Murthy issued a Surgeon General's advisory

00:00:25.820 --> 00:00:29.179
titled, Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation.

00:00:29.519 --> 00:00:32.439
In that advisory, he writes, quote, loneliness

00:00:32.439 --> 00:00:35.439
is far more than just a bad feeling. It harms

00:00:35.439 --> 00:00:38.619
both individual and societal health, end quote.

00:00:39.439 --> 00:00:41.859
When he says that, he is not speaking metaphorically.

00:00:42.060 --> 00:00:44.439
He's writing as the chief public health officer

00:00:44.439 --> 00:00:47.619
of the United States. Loneliness, in his words,

00:00:47.759 --> 00:00:51.280
is not simply emotional discomfort. It is structural

00:00:51.280 --> 00:00:54.820
and measurable. It affects individuals and it

00:00:54.820 --> 00:00:57.979
affects the broader health of society. Later

00:00:57.979 --> 00:01:00.840
in the advisory, Murthy writes, quote, it is

00:01:00.840 --> 00:01:03.100
associated with a greater risk of cardiovascular

00:01:03.100 --> 00:01:06.500
disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety,

00:01:06.739 --> 00:01:09.500
and premature death. The mortality impact of

00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:12.140
being socially disconnected is similar to that

00:01:12.140 --> 00:01:15.540
caused by smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day and

00:01:15.540 --> 00:01:17.640
even greater than that associated with obesity

00:01:17.640 --> 00:01:21.010
and physical inactivity. in the harmful consequences

00:01:21.010 --> 00:01:23.829
of a society that lacks social connection can

00:01:23.829 --> 00:01:26.329
be felt in our schools, workplaces, and civic

00:01:26.329 --> 00:01:29.209
organizations where performance, productivity,

00:01:29.530 --> 00:01:33.409
and engagement are diminished." The comparison

00:01:33.409 --> 00:01:36.650
of social disconnection to smoking 15 cigarettes

00:01:36.650 --> 00:01:40.849
a day is grounded in public health data. It places

00:01:40.849 --> 00:01:43.370
social disconnection alongside some of the most

00:01:43.370 --> 00:01:46.329
well -known preventable health risks in modern

00:01:46.329 --> 00:01:49.859
medicine. The same time, one of the longest running

00:01:49.859 --> 00:01:52.560
longitudinal studies in history conducted at

00:01:52.560 --> 00:01:55.019
Harvard University has followed participants

00:01:55.019 --> 00:01:59.219
across more than eight decades of life. Summarizing

00:01:59.219 --> 00:02:01.680
the findings of that study, psychiatrist and

00:02:01.680 --> 00:02:04.799
professor Robert Waldinger has said, good relationships

00:02:04.799 --> 00:02:08.620
keep us happier and healthier, period. He also

00:02:08.620 --> 00:02:11.199
noted the people who were the most satisfied

00:02:11.199 --> 00:02:14.319
in the relationships at age 50 were the healthiest

00:02:14.319 --> 00:02:18.599
at age 80. Now, taken together, these conclusions

00:02:18.599 --> 00:02:22.060
are remarkably consistent. The quality of our

00:02:22.060 --> 00:02:25.300
relationships shapes not only how we feel, but

00:02:25.300 --> 00:02:29.439
how long and how well we live. And yet culturally,

00:02:29.840 --> 00:02:33.280
something feels unsettled. I see it in conversations

00:02:33.280 --> 00:02:36.680
with men who are busy, accomplished, and respected,

00:02:37.039 --> 00:02:39.759
but who quietly or secretly admit they do not

00:02:39.759 --> 00:02:42.099
have many people they feel deeply connected to.

00:02:42.560 --> 00:02:45.039
I see it in women navigating divorce who are

00:02:45.039 --> 00:02:47.560
rebuilding their lives and discovering that the

00:02:47.560 --> 00:02:49.560
structure of being intentionally prioritized

00:02:49.560 --> 00:02:53.120
by someone has disappeared. I see it in marriages

00:02:53.120 --> 00:02:56.259
that do not end in dramatic betrayal, but in

00:02:56.259 --> 00:02:59.780
gradual drift. Most divorces do not begin with

00:02:59.780 --> 00:03:02.900
catastrophe. They begin with quiet disconnection.

00:03:03.240 --> 00:03:05.699
Two people who once paid close attention to each

00:03:05.699 --> 00:03:08.860
other slowly stop doing so. They stop protecting

00:03:08.860 --> 00:03:11.550
time. They stop asking deeper questions. They

00:03:11.550 --> 00:03:14.930
assume proximity equals intimacy. They share

00:03:14.930 --> 00:03:17.090
a house and a calendar and responsibilities,

00:03:17.370 --> 00:03:19.710
but somewhere along the way they stop feeling

00:03:19.710 --> 00:03:23.210
chosen. That word matters more than we often

00:03:23.210 --> 00:03:26.150
acknowledge. To feel chosen is to feel secure.

00:03:26.610 --> 00:03:28.849
It is to feel noticed, valued, and remembered

00:03:28.849 --> 00:03:31.729
in the midst of ordinary days. When that sense

00:03:31.729 --> 00:03:34.569
of being chosen fades, something essential begins

00:03:34.569 --> 00:03:37.169
to erode. The same dynamic plays out in adult

00:03:37.169 --> 00:03:39.479
friendships. Many of us build strong friendships

00:03:39.479 --> 00:03:41.879
in seasons of life where proximity did most of

00:03:41.879 --> 00:03:44.740
the work. School schedules, teams, shared dorms,

00:03:44.939 --> 00:03:48.360
structured communities. Repetition created familiarity.

00:03:48.659 --> 00:03:50.860
Familiarity created trust, and trust created

00:03:50.860 --> 00:03:54.020
depth. But adulthood rarely provides that structure

00:03:54.020 --> 00:03:56.699
automatically. Careers accelerate, families demand

00:03:56.699 --> 00:04:00.000
attention, devices fill our quiet moments. We

00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:02.659
remain in contact, but contact is not the same

00:04:02.659 --> 00:04:05.800
as connection. Loneliness often does not arrive

00:04:05.800 --> 00:04:08.659
with a dramatic event. It arrives slowly in the

00:04:08.659 --> 00:04:11.360
absence of initiative. When I think about that

00:04:11.360 --> 00:04:13.599
drift, I think about Woody and Buzz and Toy Story.

00:04:14.180 --> 00:04:16.040
At the beginning of the film, Woody is not alone.

00:04:16.160 --> 00:04:18.720
He has community, he has a history and significance.

00:04:19.240 --> 00:04:21.379
The other toys look to him as their leader and

00:04:21.379 --> 00:04:25.000
he is secure in his place. And then Buzz Lightyear

00:04:25.000 --> 00:04:28.060
enters the room. Nothing tangible is taken from

00:04:28.060 --> 00:04:30.199
Woody. Andy still loves him and he still has

00:04:30.199 --> 00:04:32.740
a home and a community. But something shifts

00:04:32.740 --> 00:04:36.120
internally. Buzz is impressive. He commands attention

00:04:36.120 --> 00:04:38.560
effortlessly. The admiration in the room begins

00:04:38.560 --> 00:04:41.600
to tilt in a new direction. Woody interprets

00:04:41.600 --> 00:04:44.680
that shift as a threat and begins to unwittingly

00:04:44.680 --> 00:04:47.980
adopt a scarcity mentality. What follows is subtle

00:04:47.980 --> 00:04:50.759
but revealing. Woody becomes competitive. He

00:04:50.759 --> 00:04:53.160
interrupts. He undermines. He attempts to orchestrate

00:04:53.160 --> 00:04:56.240
moments that will diminish Buzz. His behavior

00:04:56.240 --> 00:04:59.040
grows smaller. Not because he is cruel, but because

00:04:59.040 --> 00:05:02.839
he is afraid. He fears losing significance and

00:05:02.839 --> 00:05:05.420
being replaced. After a variety of attempts by

00:05:05.420 --> 00:05:08.319
Woody to undermine and disparage Buzz, Andy takes

00:05:08.319 --> 00:05:10.959
them both to Pizza Planet and accidentally leaves

00:05:10.959 --> 00:05:13.699
them behind. Woody is panicking and Buzz is still

00:05:13.699 --> 00:05:16.439
attempting to contact Star Command. Woody then

00:05:16.439 --> 00:05:19.379
shouts an off -repeated line to Buzz, You are

00:05:19.379 --> 00:05:23.660
a toy! You are a child's plaything! Buzz looks

00:05:23.660 --> 00:05:26.279
at him and says, You are a sad, strange little

00:05:26.279 --> 00:05:29.670
man. And you have my pity. Now, that line stings

00:05:29.670 --> 00:05:31.930
because Woody's behavior has indeed become strange

00:05:31.930 --> 00:05:34.329
and defensive. But what makes the moment complex

00:05:34.329 --> 00:05:36.870
is that Buzz sees the behavior without understanding

00:05:36.870 --> 00:05:40.290
the wound beneath it. He recognizes the insecurity

00:05:40.290 --> 00:05:43.389
but responds with dismissal rather than empathy.

00:05:44.009 --> 00:05:47.050
That dynamic is painfully familiar in adult relationships.

00:05:47.550 --> 00:05:49.990
When someone acts competitively or defensively,

00:05:50.029 --> 00:05:52.870
it is easy to label them. It is easy to say something

00:05:52.870 --> 00:05:55.560
cutting. But pity does not build connection,

00:05:56.000 --> 00:05:58.399
and name -calling does not create safety. We

00:05:58.399 --> 00:06:01.040
do not need friends who diagnose us from a distance.

00:06:01.319 --> 00:06:03.319
We need friends who are willing to understand

00:06:03.319 --> 00:06:05.980
what fear might be driving beneath the surface.

00:06:06.680 --> 00:06:10.160
Later in the film, the roles reverse. After continual

00:06:10.160 --> 00:06:13.040
attempts by Buzz to prove to everyone else that

00:06:13.040 --> 00:06:15.620
he's a real space ranger, he discovers through

00:06:15.620 --> 00:06:17.959
a television commercial that he is, in fact,

00:06:18.199 --> 00:06:22.290
a toy. His identity collapses in a moment. Woody's

00:06:22.290 --> 00:06:24.930
prior statement that Buzz is a toy was true,

00:06:25.250 --> 00:06:27.970
but the truth was delivered as a weapon. Buzz

00:06:27.970 --> 00:06:30.769
withdraws himself to isolation and depression

00:06:30.769 --> 00:06:34.029
as this truth sinks in. There is a key difference

00:06:34.029 --> 00:06:37.389
between truth and weaponized truth. Weaponized

00:06:37.389 --> 00:06:40.730
truth aims to diminish. Compassionate truth creates

00:06:40.730 --> 00:06:43.649
space for reflection, perspective, and grounded

00:06:43.649 --> 00:06:47.149
in care and empathy. One exposes weakness for

00:06:47.149 --> 00:06:49.410
the sake of dominance. The other names reality

00:06:49.410 --> 00:06:52.360
for the sake of growth. Our culture often applauds

00:06:52.360 --> 00:06:54.560
bluntness. We praise people who say that they

00:06:54.560 --> 00:06:56.660
are just being honest or who tell it like it

00:06:56.660 --> 00:06:59.959
is. Authenticity is celebrated, and rightly so.

00:07:00.399 --> 00:07:04.319
Honesty is an invaluable trait. Also, that honesty,

00:07:04.519 --> 00:07:06.600
the way it's delivered, matters just as much

00:07:06.600 --> 00:07:08.680
as the honesty itself. Saying something sharp

00:07:08.680 --> 00:07:10.779
and then hiding behind the phrase, I'm just being

00:07:10.779 --> 00:07:13.379
honest, can become a way of excusing a lack of

00:07:13.379 --> 00:07:16.420
care. Truth without kindness fractures connection.

00:07:17.079 --> 00:07:19.180
Truth delivered with kindness strengthens it.

00:07:19.629 --> 00:07:21.970
In divorce, identity collapse can feel abrupt,

00:07:22.209 --> 00:07:24.230
just like Buzz watching the commercial. Someone

00:07:24.230 --> 00:07:26.230
walks into a marriage believing they are a spouse,

00:07:26.370 --> 00:07:29.290
a partner, part of a permanent future. When divorce

00:07:29.290 --> 00:07:31.889
becomes real, that narrative shatters. Questions

00:07:31.889 --> 00:07:34.509
surface that feel deeply personal. Who am I now?

00:07:34.810 --> 00:07:36.889
What does this say about me? Was I wrong about

00:07:36.889 --> 00:07:39.709
everything? Like Buzz, many people initially

00:07:39.709 --> 00:07:41.769
withdraw. They sit quietly with the pieces of

00:07:41.769 --> 00:07:44.220
a story that no longer fit. The instinct is to

00:07:44.220 --> 00:07:46.620
isolate rather than engage. But Buzz's story

00:07:46.620 --> 00:07:49.139
does not end in isolation. He eventually accepts

00:07:49.139 --> 00:07:51.600
the truth that he is a toy, but he does not accept

00:07:51.600 --> 00:07:54.339
the implication that he is worthless or not worthy

00:07:54.339 --> 00:07:56.980
of love and admiration. To Andy, he is still

00:07:56.980 --> 00:08:00.220
Buzz Lightyear and brings fun and joy. The collapse

00:08:00.220 --> 00:08:03.000
of one narrative makes room for a more grounded

00:08:03.000 --> 00:08:06.000
identity. Woody must undergo a similar shift.

00:08:06.300 --> 00:08:08.259
He had to confront his insecurity and realize

00:08:08.259 --> 00:08:10.660
that making room for Buzz does not make him less.

00:08:11.050 --> 00:08:13.529
When he finally chooses to risk himself for Buzz

00:08:13.529 --> 00:08:16.410
rather than protect his status, something changes.

00:08:16.949 --> 00:08:19.949
He becomes more secure, not less. The room becomes

00:08:19.949 --> 00:08:22.209
richer because there is space for both of them.

00:08:22.850 --> 00:08:25.209
As a divorce attorney, I see something very similar

00:08:25.209 --> 00:08:27.730
play out after divorce. Divorce often brings

00:08:27.730 --> 00:08:30.350
an identity collapse that feels remarkably similar

00:08:30.350 --> 00:08:32.899
to Buzz watching that commercial. You lose the

00:08:32.899 --> 00:08:35.340
routine of shared mornings and evenings. You

00:08:35.340 --> 00:08:37.840
lose the assumed partnership. You face financial

00:08:37.840 --> 00:08:40.259
strain and the responsibility of supporting a

00:08:40.259 --> 00:08:43.460
new version of your family. You may feel unchosen.

00:08:43.919 --> 00:08:46.639
Even if you initiated the divorce for necessary

00:08:46.639 --> 00:08:48.940
reasons, there is still grief attached to the

00:08:48.940 --> 00:08:51.799
loss of the story you once believed. Scarcity

00:08:51.799 --> 00:08:54.460
creeps in, scarcity of love, time with your children,

00:08:54.779 --> 00:08:57.899
future connection. When scarcity sets in, insecurity

00:08:57.899 --> 00:09:01.309
often follows. An insecurity, if left unattended,

00:09:01.470 --> 00:09:04.250
can distort behavior. It can make you more critical,

00:09:04.669 --> 00:09:07.409
defensive, and reactive. It can also make you

00:09:07.409 --> 00:09:09.730
tightened instead of trust. We also see these

00:09:09.730 --> 00:09:11.929
issues creep in when a former spouse begins a

00:09:11.929 --> 00:09:14.330
new relationship. It can feel like buzz entering

00:09:14.330 --> 00:09:17.190
the room. Nothing tangible has taken from you.

00:09:17.230 --> 00:09:18.809
You still love your children and they love you.

00:09:18.909 --> 00:09:21.070
You are still their parent. Your identity as

00:09:21.070 --> 00:09:23.789
mother or father has not disappeared, but something

00:09:23.789 --> 00:09:26.740
shifts internally. The admiration in the room

00:09:26.740 --> 00:09:28.720
feels like it is tilting in a new direction.

00:09:29.159 --> 00:09:31.299
The children mention someone new. There are new

00:09:31.299 --> 00:09:34.299
routines, traditions, and influences. And suddenly,

00:09:34.440 --> 00:09:37.700
what was once secure can feel threatened. I see

00:09:37.700 --> 00:09:39.799
parents begin to compare themselves to their

00:09:39.799 --> 00:09:42.200
ex in those situations, comparing who was more

00:09:42.200 --> 00:09:44.820
present, more fun, more disciplined, more loved.

00:09:45.440 --> 00:09:48.259
I see a spike in criticism and fault -finding.

00:09:48.580 --> 00:09:50.919
I see heightened sensitivity to small things,

00:09:51.360 --> 00:09:54.200
not because people are malicious. because something

00:09:54.200 --> 00:09:57.779
deeper feels unstable. It is not really about

00:09:57.779 --> 00:10:00.419
the new partner for their ex -spouse. It is about

00:10:00.419 --> 00:10:03.139
identity. The fear of no longer being the hero

00:10:03.139 --> 00:10:05.799
in your child's life. The disorientation of no

00:10:05.799 --> 00:10:07.860
longer being the spouse in a structure that wants

00:10:07.860 --> 00:10:10.720
to find you. Even when the marriage was unhappy,

00:10:10.919 --> 00:10:13.700
there was familiarity. There was routine and

00:10:13.700 --> 00:10:17.200
belonging. I do not say that to criticize anyone

00:10:17.200 --> 00:10:20.179
navigating divorce. I say it because it is human.

00:10:20.740 --> 00:10:24.080
Fragile seasons amplify fear, and in those fragile

00:10:24.080 --> 00:10:26.759
seasons I often see two common mistakes. The

00:10:26.759 --> 00:10:29.840
first is isolation. People retreat. They convince

00:10:29.840 --> 00:10:32.179
themselves they need to handle it alone to protect

00:10:32.179 --> 00:10:34.879
their pride. They tell themselves they are wired

00:10:34.879 --> 00:10:37.740
to figure it out without leaning on anyone. The

00:10:37.740 --> 00:10:40.399
second is overcorrection, trying to prove strength,

00:10:40.700 --> 00:10:42.820
prove worth, trying to prove that they are still

00:10:42.820 --> 00:10:46.000
winning in some invisible competition. But neither

00:10:46.000 --> 00:10:49.299
isolation nor competition rebuilds belonging.

00:10:50.629 --> 00:10:53.490
For men I wish more would understand it is not

00:10:53.490 --> 00:10:55.590
weakness to talk about the emotional impact of

00:10:55.590 --> 00:10:57.889
divorce Sitting in a room with other men who

00:10:57.889 --> 00:11:00.649
are navigating similar loss does not diminish

00:11:00.649 --> 00:11:03.990
strength It strengthens belonging and wards off

00:11:03.990 --> 00:11:07.289
the feelings of doing it alone for women rebuilding

00:11:07.289 --> 00:11:09.809
after divorce I wish more understood that deepening

00:11:09.809 --> 00:11:12.210
friendships is not a distraction from healing

00:11:12.210 --> 00:11:14.590
Those friendships don't need to detract from

00:11:14.590 --> 00:11:16.850
your role as a mother. Yes You can be a great

00:11:16.850 --> 00:11:19.779
mom and do things with and for your kids and

00:11:19.779 --> 00:11:22.279
you can deepen your meaningful friendships. It

00:11:22.279 --> 00:11:25.159
is part of healing. Letting other people see

00:11:25.159 --> 00:11:27.639
your story, supporting them and letting them

00:11:27.639 --> 00:11:31.080
support you restores belonging in ways independence

00:11:31.080 --> 00:11:34.519
alone cannot. The collapse of one identity does

00:11:34.519 --> 00:11:37.840
not mean the collapse of your value. Buzz was

00:11:37.840 --> 00:11:40.120
not the space ranger he imagined, but he was

00:11:40.120 --> 00:11:43.120
still deeply loved. Woody was not being replaced,

00:11:43.240 --> 00:11:45.919
he simply had to make room. In divorce, making

00:11:45.919 --> 00:11:48.809
room for a new reality does not erase who you

00:11:48.809 --> 00:11:52.929
have been, it expands who you can become. Loneliness

00:11:52.929 --> 00:11:55.909
often grows in fragile identity. When we feel

00:11:55.909 --> 00:11:58.590
threatened, we withdraw. When we feel exposed,

00:11:58.750 --> 00:12:01.710
we protect. When we feel diminished, we tighten.

00:12:02.529 --> 00:12:05.710
Community grows in secure identity and courageous

00:12:05.710 --> 00:12:08.490
initiative. It grows when we choose to move towards

00:12:08.490 --> 00:12:11.029
someone else instead of away from them. If loneliness

00:12:11.029 --> 00:12:13.629
is a structural and measurable health concern,

00:12:13.970 --> 00:12:16.610
and if decades of research confirm that relationships

00:12:16.610 --> 00:12:19.330
shape our well -being, then waiting passively

00:12:19.330 --> 00:12:21.730
for connection is not a sustainable strategy.

00:12:22.570 --> 00:12:24.990
Courageous initiative is the engine of connection.

00:12:25.549 --> 00:12:28.110
And courageous initiative does not require a

00:12:28.110 --> 00:12:31.110
personality overhaul. It requires movement. So

00:12:31.110 --> 00:12:32.769
as you think about your own life, I want to leave

00:12:32.769 --> 00:12:35.809
you with three very clear places to begin. First,

00:12:36.129 --> 00:12:38.409
if you are busy with work and responsibilities

00:12:38.409 --> 00:12:41.509
and accomplishments, but in reality you are disconnected

00:12:41.509 --> 00:12:44.990
and lack deep, meaningful relationships, initiate

00:12:44.990 --> 00:12:47.389
instead of waiting. Do not assume your schedule

00:12:47.389 --> 00:12:50.429
excuses your isolation. Reach out to one person

00:12:50.429 --> 00:12:52.649
this week. Send the message you have been meaning

00:12:52.649 --> 00:12:55.190
to send. Invite someone to lunch or to a workout

00:12:55.190 --> 00:12:58.000
or to grab a soda and talk. Let me be clear.

00:12:58.720 --> 00:13:01.259
Leadership in your career does not replace leadership

00:13:01.259 --> 00:13:03.779
in your relationships. Taking the initiative

00:13:03.779 --> 00:13:06.139
to take the first step and lead out in the building

00:13:06.139 --> 00:13:09.620
of that community interrupts the isolation and

00:13:09.620 --> 00:13:13.139
loneliness that fills your time. Second, place

00:13:13.139 --> 00:13:15.240
yourself in one consistent environment where

00:13:15.240 --> 00:13:17.740
connection can grow naturally. Friendships deepen

00:13:17.740 --> 00:13:21.899
through repetition. Shared pursuit removes pressure

00:13:21.899 --> 00:13:25.169
and builds familiarity over time. Join something

00:13:25.169 --> 00:13:27.570
that meets weekly, something maybe you've drifted

00:13:27.570 --> 00:13:29.769
from, whether it is attending regular church

00:13:29.769 --> 00:13:31.990
functions, joining a pickleball league, a divorce

00:13:31.990 --> 00:13:34.870
support group, or bingo night. Connection is

00:13:34.870 --> 00:13:37.409
rarely built in isolated encounters, is built

00:13:37.409 --> 00:13:39.870
in repeated presence, building trust and providing

00:13:39.870 --> 00:13:43.090
a sense of belonging. Third, move one existing

00:13:43.090 --> 00:13:46.169
relationship one layer deeper. Ask a better question.

00:13:46.570 --> 00:13:49.169
Offer a more honest answer. Express appreciation

00:13:49.169 --> 00:13:52.509
out loud. Choose compassionate truth. or weaponized

00:13:52.509 --> 00:13:55.470
truth. These small shifts in vulnerability create

00:13:55.470 --> 00:13:58.409
large changes. Let's boil it down to three takeaways.

00:13:58.909 --> 00:14:01.610
One, initiate one relationship this week. Two,

00:14:01.750 --> 00:14:03.750
commit to a consistent shared environment or

00:14:03.750 --> 00:14:06.970
activity. Three, go one layer deeper with someone

00:14:06.970 --> 00:14:09.809
who already knows you. None of these steps are

00:14:09.809 --> 00:14:12.529
dramatic, but over time, they are transformative.

00:14:13.169 --> 00:14:15.490
Woody did not rebuild belonging by hoping the

00:14:15.490 --> 00:14:17.789
room would change. He rebuilt it by choosing

00:14:17.789 --> 00:14:20.700
differently and serving someone else. Buzz did

00:14:20.700 --> 00:14:23.019
not rediscover purpose by clinging to illusion.

00:14:23.500 --> 00:14:25.600
He rediscovered it by acknowledging the past

00:14:25.600 --> 00:14:28.200
and saying yes to the new reality and hope for

00:14:28.200 --> 00:14:30.940
the future. The Surgeon General did not issue

00:14:30.940 --> 00:14:33.120
an advisory because people needed more hobbies.

00:14:33.539 --> 00:14:35.919
He issued it because loneliness is harming our

00:14:35.919 --> 00:14:39.340
health. Good relationships help keep us happier

00:14:39.340 --> 00:14:42.600
and healthier. So if you are busy, respected,

00:14:42.720 --> 00:14:45.320
and even a successful professional, but secretly

00:14:45.320 --> 00:14:48.179
disconnected or lonely, this matters. If you

00:14:48.179 --> 00:14:50.460
are rebuilding after divorce and now feel alone

00:14:50.460 --> 00:14:52.759
or isolated in that rebuilding, this matters.

00:14:53.240 --> 00:14:54.980
If you've convinced yourself that you are just

00:14:54.980 --> 00:14:57.500
wired to handle things on your own, this matters.

00:14:58.320 --> 00:15:00.399
If relationships shape how long and how well

00:15:00.399 --> 00:15:02.879
we live, then building them is not optional,

00:15:03.220 --> 00:15:07.080
it is essential. Community is not found, it is

00:15:07.080 --> 00:15:11.740
built. And your health depends on it. As you

00:15:11.740 --> 00:15:14.759
lead this conversation, remember that yes, the

00:15:14.759 --> 00:15:17.409
past can hurt. and you can either run from it

00:15:17.409 --> 00:15:20.370
or you can learn from it. So here's to learning

00:15:20.370 --> 00:15:23.850
and finding joy in the journey. See you real

00:15:23.850 --> 00:15:24.029
soon.