When Grief Becomes Your Greatest Teacher: The Story of a Father Who Found Purpose in Tragedy

There are moments in life where everything changes in a single second. For James, that moment came on a regular Tuesday evening in Anaheim, California—a walk with his pregnant wife that turned into a nightmare he couldn't wake up from.

The Moment Everything Changed

James and his wife Yesenia walked every day near their home, close to Disneyland. On that Tuesday, a car jumped the curb and struck Yesenia as James was holding her hand. Yesenia was gone. And James was standing there, not knowing if his daughter—still in the womb at 36 weeks—had survived. Then came the words that changed everything: "Your daughter survived."

The Miracle That Saved Him

His newborn daughter had spent 20 minutes without oxygen. She was in the NICU, connected to tubes and breathing apparatus, fighting for her life. But James made a choice—he decided that if his daughter could fight for her life, then he could fight too.

"I saw her in that bed as she's progressing in a positive way," James recalls. "And I'm like, if this little girl is fighting for her life to be here in this world, I need to do the same."

Finding Purpose: The Encanto Lesson That Stuck

When James discovered Encanto, something clicked. The movie opens with Abuela Alma telling the story of her darkest moment—losing her husband while fleeing with three newborn babies. In that darkness, the magical house Casita emerged as the foundation for everything that followed. James saw himself in that story.

As Encanto progresses, Mirabel—the one family member without magical gifts—discovers her real power isn't about what she can do. It's about who she is. In the final song, Abuela realizes the greatest gift was never the magic. It was the family itself. That's what James learned too.

The Discipline of Presence: 20 Minutes That Matter

One of the most practical insights James shares: dedicate at least 20 minutes a day of undivided attention to your child. No phone. No distraction. Just presence.

"Those 20 minutes will feel like an eternity for them," James explains. "They won't care that you were gone for eight to 10 hours at work. All they look forward to throughout their day is that little bit of time dedicated solely to them."

Choosing Love Over Grief

The hardest part of James's story isn't the tragedy. It's the choice he made afterward. James chose to let his daughter's strength become his strength. He chose to find meaning in the mundane—in diaper changes, in late-night feedings, in the butterfly or hummingbird that reminds him his late wife is still checking in.

"Love will find you even when you're not looking," James reflects. "Love comes in different forms and shapes."

The miracle wasn't that his daughter survived. The miracle is that James chose to survive too—transforming devastation into devotion.

Listen to James's full story at YouTube.com/@YesAndLand | More at ridethewave.media/yes-and-land