The Hammerin Hank Show With Henry Ochs & Ryan Hoppe: Episode 65

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What up, Hammer and Hank? How are you? How you

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doing, buddy? Doing pretty good. If I hit the

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button, would you be ready to start the show?

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Down four. Mm -hmm. You're listening to The Hammer

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and Hank Show with Henry Oaks and Ryan Hoppy.

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How are you? I'm glad we did a show this week,

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even though I'm really trying to push it out

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there, push out the content, you know? Episode

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65. Our show is officially a senior citizen.

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I just sent you a PSA. Do you want to begin the

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show with it? I sent you a PSA just now. Henry

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Oaks, I understand. I have the PSA in front of

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me. Do you want me to play it to begin the show?

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Yes. You're not going to be able to hear it on

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your end, but I'll point to you when we're done.

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Right now. You can make a difference. Did you

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know that autism is the fastest growing developmental

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disability in the country, but early help can

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change everything. Does your child make eye contact?

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Respond to their name, play with other kids,

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or does your child focus only on one toy or one

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object? You know your child best. If something

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doesn't feel right, trust that feeling and get

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help early. Learn the signs at AutismSpeaks .org

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slash signs. You can make a difference. Find

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out what's going on in the Bay Area. Visit 981thebreeze

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.com slash calendar. I like that. Now, it talked

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about how you obsess over, how autistic people

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obsess over one thing. Maybe I have a little

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autism because I obsess over radio, Hanky. I

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have ADHD. Me too. What is your radio memory

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of the week? My radio memory of the week? I have...

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What is? What is... Started my second stint at

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KCRH way back in 2010. How was it back at KCRH

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in 2010? It was very good. What was so good about

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it? I got to play a lot of music, interact with

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people. That's good. I'm proud of you. I'll be

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back on KCRH with a special show this Monday.

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What's going on? What's the latest in the Hammer

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and Hank air show and KCRH? Any news? I'm coming

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back to KCRH. My show will probably be on Wednesday.

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Hell yeah! Every Wednesday from 10 a .m. to noon.

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How many tours have you done there? And when

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I say tours, I'm making a joke like serving in

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a war. How many times have you, how many years

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have you been on KCRH altogether? A lot. Too

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many to count, right? Too many to count, yep.

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You know what else there is too much to count

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of? How many times you have been on the nationally

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syndicated Woody Show? A lot. How's that going?

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Pretty good. What do you guys do? We're doing

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a segment called Woody Show Crossfire. Is that

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how Woody introduces it? Yep. What do you guys

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talk about on that? Got this in the news. Yeah.

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Sounds interesting. It's definitely the Woody

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shows. It's going to be interesting. On a scale

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of one to 10, how much do you love being on the

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Woody show in 50 cities? 11. That's always your

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number. Not 12 or 13? 11. That makes sense. Hammer

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and Hank, do you have any other radio memories

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in your 40 years of radio? Yes. What? I got to

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host a nightclub back in 1997. Oh, yeah. What

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nightclub? It was somebody's nightclub in Fremont.

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Did you get a blowjob there? No, I danced with

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some females, so. Were they Latina? Yes, they

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were. Oh, yeah. You love. Yep. On a one to ten,

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how much do you love Latino women? Eleven. That

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is your number. I thought it'd be a million.

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They got big booties for dice. Hey, buddy. Spank

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it. I'm hammering Hank. Any updates? Do you know

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what I'm going to ask you? It's not church news.

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Do you know what I want to ask you the update

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about? What? Guess. Make one guess. Radio career.

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No. How the hell is the transition? No, now you're

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becoming another gender. How is the transition

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of you becoming a member of Hinge? I never joined

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yet. I haven't joined yet. Well, time's going

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by. I think you did well on there. Okay. I'm

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going to look into how I can help you date because

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I want you to get, dude, why don't you just join?

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Join today. I should probably say no. You're

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57 years old. I love you. Dude, you got rocks

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that got to get off. Now, obviously. You would

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need to specify that you don't drive and that

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you're autistic, but that you're high functioning,

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but I think you're fine. I think you're good.

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I mean, don't you want to bang out a Latina hot

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piece of ass? Yes. Who wouldn't? Hammer and Hank,

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I'm going to ask you. Work on that this week

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and don't even ask Smurfette. I don't want to

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get in trouble with Smurfer. But you're 55 years

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old. You're AARP. You deserve love. Cool, buddy.

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Right? Cool, buddy. We'll see if that happens.

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If I had the music, would you be ready for the

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joke? Yes, buddy. All right, let me hit it. Hank's

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joke hitting like a thumper. Oh, yeah. Punch

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lines cracking louder than a cat. No punk. Ryan

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Hoppy rides shotgun with oak. Next joke of the

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day got us rolling on the floor. Comedy gold

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from the top to the core. Oh, yeah. What do you

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got, Hank? Did I bring you a ruler to bed? Say

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it one more time. Why did I bring you a ruler

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to bed? Why? Because I wanted to see how long

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I slept. Oh, yeah. Why did I take my computer

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to the doctor? Why? Because it had a virus. Ha

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-ha! Why did I bring an umbrella to work? Why?

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Because my boss said there was a chance of a

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brainstorm. Wrong button. Next! Why did I put

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my watch in the refrigerator? Why? Because I

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wanted to freeze time. Why did I bring a chair

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to the party? Why? Because I wanted to sit this

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one out. Why did I take the pistol on vacation?

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Why? Because I wanted to draw some attention.

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Why did I bring a broom to work? Why? Because

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I wanted to sleep the competition. Okay. Why

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did I put a wall on a diet? Why? Because it was

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losing weight anyway. Mm -hmm. Why did I bring

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Matt to the bar? Why? Because I was looking for

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a happy hour. Are you okay? Why did I bring Clark

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to lunch? Why? Because it was time to eat. And

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this is for the jokes. You got trivia for me?

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If I hit the music? Yes. Alright. Let me hit

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the music about trivia right now. Let me hit

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the music. Yeah, we bring in the knowledge up.

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Take a seat. Ready on for trivia. Who had the

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top ten hit remake record you keep me hanging

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on back in 1987? Who? Kim Wilde. Nice. Never

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heard of it. Who had the top ten hit record Waiting

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for a Star to Fall back in 1988? Bado. Nope.

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Boy meets girl. Never heard of it. Next. That's

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it for the trivia for this week. So Hank, have

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you heard of Wayne Mesmer? Yes. He's the public

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address announcer for the Cubs, the Saints, and

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the Nationals. It was some of their games. Did

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you know that before I texted you this week?

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Yes, I did. Hammer and Hank. Guess what? Yes.

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So the church, my mom's Roman Catholic church

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that, She goes to a lot of radio personalities

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and TV anchors that are Roman Catholic will visit.

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Like Kevin Matthews, who was on 97 .9 The Loop,

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wrote a book about how the praying a rosary helps

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him with his ALS. It's called Broken Mary. Anyway,

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so in Chicago, there's a lot of Catholics and

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a lot of the media figures are. And Wayne Mesmer

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was at a church luncheon at St. Edna's Church

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in Arlington Heights, Illinois. And my mom is

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a big fan of you. She loves you. Everyone loves

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Hank. Well, my mom played your latest national

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anthem for Wayne. My mom played your latest national

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anthem for Wayne Mesmer. And Wayne Mesmer wanted

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to say that he's proud of you and that he loves

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that you got all the lyrics right. So this week's

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listener comment is Wayne Mesmer, one of the

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greatest national anthem singers ever, saying

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he's proud of you, Hank. Thank you, buddy. You're

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welcome, dude. Isn't that pretty cool that Wayne

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Mesmer knows who you are? Yep. You got this.

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When's your next national anthem? Next Friday

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at the Haywood National Park. They'll be taking

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it on the Royal. Kickoff is today for 7 p .m.

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Where is it at? One more time. Haywood High.

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All right. That sounds good. All right, Henry

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and Hank. That's what I'm playing. Church music.

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Man, we have such good chemistry. Oh, what's

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going on at church? Are we returning to CB First

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Church and Cash Rally this Sunday? Mm -hmm. We

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have a guest speaker. Nice. Who is that? Another

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Pastor John. Nice. So many Johns out there. Mm

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-hmm. They're pimps. What are you learning from

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Jesus? I mean, Jeebus. How to become a better

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person? I think you do a good job already, but

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I'm proud of you, bud. Anything else in the world

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of church? I wish I could do more for the church.

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I think you do enough, but you do more than me.

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I'm going to burn in hell. You're the best. If

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I had the music, are you ready for Buddy on the

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Lake? Yes. All right, let me hit the Buddy of

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the Week music right here. Hmm. Yo. It's never

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an episode. Autistic genius always keeping it

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dank. Henry Oaks on the mic. Hop, ride, and shotgun.

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Roll call for the buddies. We just having some

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fun. Buddy of the Week. We're going to get the

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crown. I ain't bringing smiles. Hank, who is

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your buddies of the week? Definitely Wayne Mesmer.

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Hell yeah. The legend, the GOAT. Anybody else?

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He loved my national anthem. I honestly, when

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my mom told me that, Hank, that absolutely made

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my day because I know how hard you work at it.

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And honestly. You may not have the singing voice

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of like that African -American woman. Like you

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do a good job at singing, but you may not have

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the like vocal cords of some people that have

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messed it up. But like, for example, Fergie,

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but you get the lyrics down because you're fucking

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smart and a legend. I'm proud of you. A big up

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to Hammer and Hank. Fucking legend. Any other

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buddies? Yes? Who? Tom Lofian. Who's that? He's

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my teacher, Shabo. Oh, your teacher at KCRH?

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Yep. I had lunch with him this past Wednesday.

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What'd you get to eat? The volcano, which is

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pancakes, eggy -beggy, sausage, and bacon. Sounds

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delicious. Any other buddies? That's it. You

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got a prick? Nope, not this week. You always

00:15:08.909 --> 00:15:10.730
write that in your prep and then you never have

00:15:10.730 --> 00:15:13.669
a prick. But you do have a prick. You just need

00:15:13.669 --> 00:15:15.710
your prick to get touched by a Latina woman.

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Anyway, I thought that was funny. Anything else

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on your mind? Yes. What's happening? I think

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my audition is seeing the National Anthem at

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the Santa Cruz Warriors game anytime soon. Is

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that like the NBA D -League? That's the G League.

00:15:35.149 --> 00:15:37.049
Yeah, I guess they used to be called the D League.

00:15:37.110 --> 00:15:39.090
Now it's the G League. Yeah, I think that'd be

00:15:39.090 --> 00:15:41.669
perfect. I think that would be, is that an affiliate

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of the Warriors? Yes. I think that would be your

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in. My goal, my dream. I could make it in radio.

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I could get a hot ass wife that fucks me every

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day and sucks me off in the morning. But hey,

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if you were to sing the national anthem at a

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Warriors game. None of those goals would need

00:16:02.830 --> 00:16:05.789
to be achieved. I would fly out for that. That

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would be awesome. So we're going to make it happen.

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Give me the contact info and I will help you

00:16:11.289 --> 00:16:19.490
out. Anything else? That's it. Hank, I've been

00:16:19.490 --> 00:16:22.690
kind of a tired man and like, oh, he's in true

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Hammer and Hank fashion. You cheered me up. Hammer

00:16:26.850 --> 00:16:30.490
and Hank, what is the moral? What is the lesson

00:16:30.490 --> 00:16:35.889
for today's show? Never, never give up. And always

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stay focused on your goals. Yeah. Hank. And I'll

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talk to you real soon. Peace in your hood. Love

00:16:43.610 --> 00:16:47.909
you, bro. Love you. Bye. See you next week. Bye,

00:16:47.990 --> 00:16:53.470
buddy. I'll text you in five minutes. And there

00:16:53.470 --> 00:16:57.960
goes Hammer and Hank. If you're listening on

00:16:57.960 --> 00:17:01.980
Fresno, Hoppy Hour is up next. Then the Wake

00:17:01.980 --> 00:17:08.680
and Bake Mix and then Hoppy Hour. And if you're

00:17:08.680 --> 00:17:10.400
listening on the podcast, search Hoppy Radio.

00:17:23.109 --> 00:17:26.549
Yo, Mike Crackle, hammering Hank on the tackle.

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Autistic mind sharper than a bone -chilling shackle.

00:17:29.230 --> 00:17:31.589
Henry Oates with the hops, Ryan hop in the spot.

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Radio waves hitting hard like a chef with a pot.

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Farewell, hammering Hank, gotta close up the

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show. Legend in the booth where the vibes used

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to flow. Autism warrior, always running the glow.

00:17:42.109 --> 00:17:44.430
But all good things gotta let the curtain go

00:17:44.430 --> 00:17:46.890
slow. On the dial, spitting truth with his unique

00:17:46.890 --> 00:17:49.309
grind. Thoughts intertwined like graffiti on

00:17:49.309 --> 00:17:52.009
the line. Ryan on the Mike Henry's rhythm divine.

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They the blueprint. Every beat they design. Static

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in the speakers where the laughter used to ride.

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Hank led the show with that beautiful pride.

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Autism didn't stop him, not amplified. Hammer

00:18:03.289 --> 00:18:06.170
and Hank forever immortalized. Farewell, Hammer

00:18:06.170 --> 00:18:08.690
and Hank. Gotta close up the show. Legend in

00:18:08.690 --> 00:18:11.369
the booth where the vibes used to flow. Autism

00:18:11.369 --> 00:18:13.849
warrior always running the glow. But all good

00:18:13.849 --> 00:18:18.099
things gotta lift the curtain. a ghost he a host

00:18:18.099 --> 00:18:20.339
with the sauce Henry Oaks and Reinhardt lightning

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never lost puzzle piece crown man this dude was

00:18:23.160 --> 00:18:26.299
the boss city Mr. Voice that's the ultimate cost

00:18:56.680 --> 00:18:59.119
Fair well, Hammer and Hank gotta close up the

00:18:59.119 --> 00:19:01.539
show. Legend in the booth where the vibes used

00:19:01.539 --> 00:19:04.079
to flow. Here's a woman, you're always running

00:19:04.079 --> 00:19:06.799
aglow. But all good things gotta let the curtain

00:19:06.799 --> 00:19:19.640
go slow. Radio gate never goes. He a host with

00:19:19.640 --> 00:19:21.660
the sauce. Henry Oaks and Ryan Harp. Lightning

00:19:21.660 --> 00:19:24.519
never lost. Puzzle piece crown. Man, this dude

00:19:24.519 --> 00:19:45.789
was the boss. That's the ultimate cost. What's

00:19:45.789 --> 00:19:48.109
up? Ryan Hoppe here. And I want to tell you about

00:19:48.109 --> 00:19:51.549
the Ride the Wave Media Podcast Network. They

00:19:51.549 --> 00:19:54.029
got such great shows. It's Practically Magic,

00:19:54.369 --> 00:19:57.569
Those Guys, Blaine's World, and even my show,

00:19:57.809 --> 00:20:00.569
Hoppe Hour with Ryan Hoppe, which can be heard

00:20:00.569 --> 00:20:03.509
by searching Hoppe Radio. This podcast network

00:20:03.509 --> 00:20:07.089
is going to take over the world. It is everything

00:20:07.089 --> 00:20:09.690
that radio is missing. Now you're hearing my

00:20:09.690 --> 00:20:13.170
voice and you go, how can I find it? RideTheWave

00:20:13.170 --> 00:20:16.789
.media is the website name. and there has all

00:20:16.789 --> 00:20:19.930
the great podcasts. And once again, this is Ryan

00:20:19.930 --> 00:20:25.319
Hoppe from the Ride the Wave Media Podcast. Hey,

00:20:25.380 --> 00:20:27.839
what's up guys? It's Ryan Hoppe here. I host

00:20:27.839 --> 00:20:30.480
the award -winning and nationally syndicated

00:20:30.480 --> 00:20:34.019
Hoppe Hour podcast, but I'm not bragging. It's

00:20:34.019 --> 00:20:37.960
a mix of a 2000s, 1990s morning show in a podcast

00:20:37.960 --> 00:20:40.759
format. You never know what I might talk about.

00:20:40.839 --> 00:20:43.200
One minute I could be talking about the latest

00:20:43.200 --> 00:20:46.779
with the NFL side chicks, and the very next second

00:20:46.779 --> 00:20:50.140
I could be playing an unknown song from the 2000s.

00:20:50.160 --> 00:20:54.690
My show is an in -studio circus. for the age

00:20:54.690 --> 00:20:57.710
group of 18 to 34, even though we have 70 -year

00:20:57.710 --> 00:21:00.609
-olds that listen. For more info, if you want

00:21:00.609 --> 00:21:03.609
to be a sponsor, a friend, and no, not a drinking

00:21:03.609 --> 00:21:06.390
sponsor, a sponsor of the show of Hoppy Hour,

00:21:06.630 --> 00:21:11.329
go to ridethewave .media is the website, and

00:21:11.329 --> 00:21:15.470
ryanhoppyradio at gmail .com. Once again, this

00:21:15.470 --> 00:21:19.250
is Ryan Hoppy of the Hoppy Hour podcast, and

00:21:19.250 --> 00:21:20.369
let's do some business.