The Hammerin Hank Show With Henry Ochs & Ryan Hoppe: Episode 55

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What up, Hammer and Hank? Oh, jeez, I'm gonna...

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Hello, buddy. How are you? Are you doing good,

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buddy? Yes, I am. I just swam, so I'm ready to

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get the show going. But first, we gotta do the

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opening production. Are you ready to start? Yes,

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buddy. Let's go. You're listening to The Hammer

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and Hank Show with Henry Oaks and Ryan Hoppy.

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Legend on the airwaves free. Autistic kingpin.

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Cali's hard OG. Wild 949. He the voice they need.

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Doghouse days. Laying down the cream. Too legit

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to quit. Hammond and Hank on fire. Mike in hand.

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Lifeline and wire. Radio beast ain't showing

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no tire. Underdog champion. Always going higher.

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What up? Hey! How are you? Not bad, man. How

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are you? I've been pretty good. What you been

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up to? I haven't talked to you in like 10 days.

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I've been busy. What you been busy with? Just

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work. That sounds very boring. Is it boring or

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is it good busy? It's extremely boring, I'm afraid.

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Leave us a voicemail. It's 856 -494 -6773. We

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got a comment here. Hammer and Hank, I've been

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a fan of you since you were on Mad Cow's morning

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show on Wild 107. Keep up the good work. So that's

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our listener comment. Hammer and Hank, what is

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your radio memory this week? My radio memory

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this week? It's when I got to get... to attend

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my first radio promotion in Modesto. Let's just

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say she called 97 FM, KSJQ, way back in 1985.

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What did you do there? I danced with a girl named

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Laura. Oh, yeah. What else? And I got to win

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some prizes like water slide passes. That's awesome.

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Unfortunately, I didn't get to use them. Oh,

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that sucks. I wonder if they can still be used

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40 years later. Hammer and Hank, I want to ask

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you. So now, this is the big brother in me, even

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though you're older than me by like 30 years.

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This is the big brother in me, or maybe 25 years,

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but this is the big brother in me taking care

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of you. You know, I adore you. You know, I decline

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podcast requests every month. Because people

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want to do video and I don't do video and I don't

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want to talk about my career. So I'm kind of

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a man of mystery, Hank. I only do this show in

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my show Hoppy Hour. Now, I want to ask you, because

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I'm your dog. I'm your guy. I'm not patting myself

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on the back. I'm just saying I take pride in

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being your dude. Hammer and Hank, why do you

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think Wild 94 .9 is against you? Because... I'm

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on autism. Did they say something or are you

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assuming? I'm assuming. Hank, I love you more

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than anything. I never had a sibling. You're

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like the brother. I never had. Now, were they

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busting your balls maybe 25 years ago, a quarter

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century ago? Yeah. Elvis probably crossed the

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line a little bit too much, but Hank, I don't

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think... I think they're too busy trying to figure

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out how to get the ratings up. I don't think

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they're making, I think you're good, bud. And

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if they are, screw them. Yeah. But I don't think

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they're doing that. What made you think that?

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Because, you know, I was bullied for a bit when

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I was on the party crew by the party crew members.

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You were what, on the party crew? Bullied. When?

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What year was this? I think it was 1998. Hanky,

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that was 28 years ago. So if Facebook was around

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in 1998, I would get it. I would say you're fine,

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Hank. I'm telling you, radio is so terrible,

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though, that they actually need someone. How

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much radio is good again? It's not going to happen

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when I hired to buy in all the stations 25 years

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ago. I just wanted to see what that post was

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about. I was sitting at my computer in my studio,

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and I was like, what is Hank talking about? Hank,

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what is your radio memory of the lake? I talked

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about it. Oh, that's right. You don't have another?

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I don't know why. You know the dog's house? Yeah.

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We're nominated for the Bay Area Radio Hall of

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Fame. Do you think you have a chance to make

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it in? Probably not. Whoa! What an endorsement

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from one of the legendary cast members. Why?

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Because of competitions. Well, you guys are the

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biggest show ever. Who else is going in? Who

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else is on the list of candidates for San Francisco

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radio? One of the people I worked with when I

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was at KCRH, Aaron Axelson. I've heard of him.

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Live 105, yes. I've heard of him. And Big Von.

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I think the doghouse will get in. If they don't,

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it's because they were Aegean people. I did not

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like that. Aaron! I hope we get it, though. Don't

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we all? We hope we get it. I don't know what

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that means. Everett Hank, how was your recent

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appearance on Jeff Fife's radio show, The Woody

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Show? Really good. We did another round of Woody

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Show Crossfire. Oh, no. What did you guys talk

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about? It was good. What did you guys do? We

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talked about... Thanks for the news. My upcoming

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San Jose Giants National Anthem audition. I mean,

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performance. I'm sorry. You're good. And also,

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the fact that I wrote my name for the Bay Area

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Radio Hall of Fame. Hammer and Hank, I think

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if they get into the Hall of Fame, you need to

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go up there and pull a stunt. Stick it to them!

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Or no, you're a classy guy. You wouldn't do that.

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I would. I would go up there and just bitch slap

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Elvis. Ah, Hank, we need some humor right now.

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We need to laugh a little bit. Are you ready

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for the jokes if I hit the music? Yes. All right,

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one second. What's your joke? Why do I always

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bring my phone treasure with me? Why? Because

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living before 20 % battery feels illegal. Wrong

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button. Wrong button. Why do I look in the mirror

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before leaving the house? Why? Because I like

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one final chance to lower my expectations. Why

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do I keep... Those old cables? Why? Because one

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day I might find out what to go. Or what to do.

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Why do I always pick the longest checkout line?

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Why? Because I have gift for bad timing. Next.

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Why do I stare at the menu for 10 minutes? Why?

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I mean stare at the menu for 10 minutes. I'm

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sorry. Here again. Because I enjoy ordering the

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same thing every time. Why do I keep getting

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snooze? Why? Because my bed is better negotiated

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than I am. Wow, mouthful. Why do I get nervous

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when someone says, can I ask you a question?

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Because it's a cop? Because it never ends with

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winning the lottery. Why do I walk into the kitchen

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so often? Why? Because boredom and hunger wear

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the same outfit. Why do I always think I'll remember

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something important? Why? Because writing it

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down would make too much sense. And finally,

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Yeah. Why do I love free samples? Why do you

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love free samples? Because nothing tastes better

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than the food I don't pay for. That's it for

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the joke for this week. Oh, yeah. Right now you

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can't hear it because you're on Zoom. Bye. What

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do you think I'm playing? Think you're playing?

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What do you think I'm playing? You can't hear

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it on Zoom. What music is it? Yeah. Breakdown

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Javis. How's that going, bud? Pretty good. What

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are you talking about there? What are you learning

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about Jeebus? Marriage. Marriage? Yep. What are

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you learning about marriage? Not to commit adultery.

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Oh, yeah. Half the people on the radio know.

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I wonder if I was married, but unfortunately

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I'll never be able to. But that's okay. Wait,

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wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Pump

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the brakes. Why can't Hank get married? Because

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I still haven't found what I'm looking for. I

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know there's no video to this show, but the video

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of Hank singing was adorable. You're just the

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best, dude. You always cheer me up. Hank, it's

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11 minutes and 11 seconds. We're going to manifest

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that hot piece of ass Latino wife of yours, okay?

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All right. She'll be saying, oh, God. Oh, man,

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it's getting a little dirty here. I have her

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at Hank. If I hit the music, are you ready for

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trivia? Yes. What's that? Turn on the show with

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Henry and Ryan. Pop trivia questions. Yeah, no

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lying. Got my mind sharp like a blade that's

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flying. They asking those questions. Got my brain

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frying. Hammer and Hank's got the mic up high.

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Pop hits playing to the end of the sky. Gotta

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keep it real. Can't let it slide. Answers in

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my head. Can't let them hide. Pop trivia. Yeah,

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we bringing the heat. Get your knowledge up.

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Take a seat. Playing those hits while the knowledge

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fleets. Hammer and Hank never miss a beat. From

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MJ's moonwalk to Elton's flair. All right, Hank,

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what do you got? Top ten adult contemporary hit

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records. You're so vain. Way back in the mid

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-70s. I know this song. You probably think this

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song is about you. I don't know who sings it.

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Who is it? Cher? Harley Simon. That hot piece

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of ass. Anybody else? That's it for this week.

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Oh, Jesus Christ. Hank? I'm gonna ask you. What

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is a daytime talk show that you would love to

00:12:30.909 --> 00:12:34.929
be a guest of? Definitely the Jennifer Hudson

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show. Oh, he's hot. I'd bring her the ruckus.

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Would you bring her the ruckus, Hank? Because

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I want to talk about my long and storied radio

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career. Any other shows you want to go on? You

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can't go on Kelly Clarkson or Sherry Shepard

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anymore. Nope, because those shows were unfortunately

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canceled. Because their ratings were down. Well,

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Kelly Clarkson was because her baby daddy died.

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Aaron Hank, let's have some positive vibes. Are

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you ready for Buddy of the Week? Yes. One sec.

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Maybe turn it up in the club. Yeah. Tune in to

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the show. It's Hammer and Hank. Autistic genius

00:13:18.730 --> 00:13:21.529
always keeping it dank. Henry Oaks on the mic.

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Right shot gun. Roll call. What is it? Oh, that's

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right. Hey, who's your buddy of the week? What?

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The Woody Show. The Woody Show? Yeah. I like

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Jeff Fife and Jason McMurray. Those are their

00:13:42.700 --> 00:13:47.100
real names. Woody and Madness. Yeah. The guy

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that won't talk to me. He can't be very, very,

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very good. What? Very good? They take care of

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me very, very, very good. That's good. Don't

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forget about me when you make it big time, bud.

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And also you. Whatever. You're my buddy of the

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week also, buddy. I'm chopped liver. I ain't

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Woody's chef. I'm seeing this coworker of mine.

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She always dresses down in the office and I'm

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looking at Instagram. Oh my God. She's at this

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like pool party. Oh my God. I know it's a visual

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and no one can see it, but that is just, do you

00:14:21.940 --> 00:14:23.539
ever see that Hank whenever you're on social

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media and you just stop what you're doing when

00:14:25.980 --> 00:14:32.460
you see a video, just hot ass girls. Yep. You

00:14:32.460 --> 00:14:35.100
probably spanked to a toe. You're like, Smurfette,

00:14:35.360 --> 00:14:37.620
give me five minutes. I'm kidding. I love you.

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How was your breakfast? I had a ham and cheese

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omelet, hash browns, one sausage link, orange

00:14:49.740 --> 00:14:53.200
juice, and coffee. Wow. That's going to be a

00:14:53.200 --> 00:14:56.580
big dump later. At the Norman C. Cash Rally.

00:14:56.960 --> 00:14:59.720
Hey, goodbye at the music. Are you ready for

00:14:59.720 --> 00:15:03.379
a prick in the news? I don't have a prick this

00:15:03.379 --> 00:15:06.559
week. How dare you? I'm kidding. You put it in

00:15:06.559 --> 00:15:10.879
the prep. You silly goose, you. My prick of the

00:15:10.879 --> 00:15:14.480
week. I decided last night not to do one this

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week. You're so good, dude. It would have been

00:15:17.879 --> 00:15:19.879
a good prick of the week. We all would have been

00:15:19.879 --> 00:15:22.379
laughing, but it's all good. Hammer and egg.

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Anything else? We're in, Hank. Henry Oaks. Because

00:15:29.799 --> 00:15:32.240
people, because some people like me, some people

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don't. Oh, the people that don't like you can

00:15:34.360 --> 00:15:36.980
kiss my ass. There's plenty of people. People

00:15:36.980 --> 00:15:40.539
who don't like me would kiss my butt. Oh, yeah.

00:15:40.919 --> 00:15:43.139
There's plenty of people that don't like me and

00:15:43.139 --> 00:15:45.100
some of them are listening right now. Guess what?

00:15:45.320 --> 00:15:47.679
We're wedding because you're listening. Ha ha.

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Anyway, anything else, Hank? I used to watch

00:15:52.980 --> 00:15:57.850
Popeye cartoons way back in the early 80s. One

00:15:57.850 --> 00:16:02.549
of the first DVDs I ever got in 2003 when DVDs

00:16:02.549 --> 00:16:05.490
came out. You remember like when you go to the

00:16:05.490 --> 00:16:07.509
local grocery store and you could get one of

00:16:07.509 --> 00:16:09.990
those DVDs for like 99 cents and it had all the

00:16:09.990 --> 00:16:14.149
cartoons from that era? Yep. I had the Popeye

00:16:14.149 --> 00:16:19.649
CD and the Superman, the original cartoon. I

00:16:19.649 --> 00:16:23.750
love Popeye. The movie was terrible. The live

00:16:23.750 --> 00:16:31.039
action film was horrendous. Today on Hoppy Hour,

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I talked about ghosting and women that ghost,

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and I began to show by playing Casper the Friendly

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Ghost, the song. Remember that cartoon? It was

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Radio Hilarity. Hammer and Hank. Remember that

00:16:42.299 --> 00:16:45.899
cartoon? Yeah, it was a good cartoon. It was

00:16:45.899 --> 00:16:48.480
a very good cartoon, buddy. Is there anything

00:16:48.480 --> 00:16:53.200
else on the mind of Hammer and Hank? It just

00:16:53.200 --> 00:16:56.179
about does it. All right. Let me hit the music.

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Oh, wrong music. Let me hit this right here.

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Hammer and Egg, what is on your mind to wrap

00:17:05.059 --> 00:17:11.599
up episode 55 of the Hammer and Egg Show? Never

00:17:11.599 --> 00:17:14.960
give up on your goals. Always stay focused. And

00:17:14.960 --> 00:17:19.259
sometimes, or maybe someday, your wishes will

00:17:19.259 --> 00:17:21.940
come true. And I'll talk to you real soon. Peace

00:17:21.940 --> 00:17:27.799
in your hood. Bye, Egg! Peace in your head. Mmm.

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Okay. I got it. And there he goes on Zoom. The

00:17:33.140 --> 00:17:35.900
man. The myth. The legend. And if you're mean

00:17:35.900 --> 00:17:52.480
to him, you're a douchebag. Bye. Yeah. Yo. Yo.

00:17:53.500 --> 00:17:57.500
Yo, yo, Mike Crackle, Hammerin' Hank on the tackle

00:17:57.500 --> 00:18:00.140
Autistic mind sharper than a bone -chilling shackle

00:18:00.140 --> 00:18:02.539
Henry Oates with the hops, Ryan Hop in the spot

00:18:02.539 --> 00:18:04.980
Radio waves hittin' hard like a chef with a pot

00:18:04.980 --> 00:18:07.480
Farewell, Hammerin' Hank, gotta close up the

00:18:07.480 --> 00:18:09.880
show Legend in the booth where the vibes used

00:18:09.880 --> 00:18:12.900
to flow Autism warrior, always runnin' the glow

00:18:12.900 --> 00:18:15.359
But all good things gotta let the curtain go

00:18:15.359 --> 00:18:17.819
slow On the dial, spittin' truth with his unique

00:18:17.819 --> 00:18:20.380
grind Thoughts intertwined like graffiti on the

00:18:20.380 --> 00:18:49.400
line We'll be right back. He a host with the

00:18:49.400 --> 00:18:51.579
sauce Henry Oaks and Reinhardt Lightning never

00:18:51.579 --> 00:18:54.240
lost Puzzle piece crown Man this dude was the

00:18:54.240 --> 00:18:57.259
boss City Mr. Voice That's the ultimate coast

00:19:27.829 --> 00:19:30.309
Farewell Hammer and Hank Gotta close up the show

00:19:30.309 --> 00:19:32.910
Legend in the booth Where the vibes used to flow

00:19:32.910 --> 00:19:36.089
Autism warrior Always running the glow But all

00:19:36.089 --> 00:19:48.470
good things Gotta let the curtain go slow Radio

00:19:48.470 --> 00:19:51.309
gate never ghost He a host with the sauce Henry

00:19:51.309 --> 00:19:54.130
Oaks and Ryan Harp Life never lost Puzzle piece

00:19:54.130 --> 00:19:58.160
crown Man this dude was the boss The ultimate

00:19:58.160 --> 00:20:24.470
cause. Hey, what's up, guys? It's Ryan Hoppe

00:20:24.470 --> 00:20:27.490
here. I host the award -winning and nationally

00:20:27.490 --> 00:20:31.089
syndicated Hoppe Hour podcast. But I'm not bragging.

00:20:31.170 --> 00:20:34.990
It's a mix of a 2000s, 1990s morning show in

00:20:34.990 --> 00:20:37.950
a podcast format. You never know what I might

00:20:37.950 --> 00:20:40.329
talk about. One minute I could be talking about

00:20:40.329 --> 00:20:43.549
the latest with the NFL side chicks. And the

00:20:43.549 --> 00:20:46.210
very next second, I could be playing an unknown

00:20:46.210 --> 00:20:50.329
song from the 2000s. My show is an in -studio

00:20:50.329 --> 00:20:54.490
circus for the age group of 18 to 34, even though

00:20:54.490 --> 00:20:57.329
we have 70 -year -olds that listen. For more

00:20:57.329 --> 00:21:00.069
info, if you want to be a sponsor, a friend,

00:21:00.269 --> 00:21:02.910
and no, not a drinking sponsor, a sponsor of

00:21:02.910 --> 00:21:07.509
the show of Hoppy Hour, go to ridethewave .media

00:21:07.509 --> 00:21:12.009
is the website, and ryanhoppyradio at gmail .com.

00:21:12.650 --> 00:21:16.150
This is Ryan Hoppe of the Hoppe Hour podcast,

00:21:16.349 --> 00:21:19.630
and let's do some business. What's up? Ryan Hoppe

00:21:19.630 --> 00:21:21.930
here, and I want to tell you about the Ride to

00:21:21.930 --> 00:21:25.430
Wave Media Podcast Network. They got such great

00:21:25.430 --> 00:21:29.210
shows. It's Practically Magic, Those Guys, Blaine's

00:21:29.210 --> 00:21:32.430
World, and even my show, Hoppe Hour with Ryan

00:21:32.430 --> 00:21:34.509
Hoppe, which can be heard by searching Hoppe

00:21:34.509 --> 00:21:38.009
Radio. This podcast network is going to take

00:21:38.009 --> 00:21:41.069
over the world. It is everything that radio is

00:21:41.069 --> 00:21:43.269
missing. Now you're hearing my voice and you

00:21:43.269 --> 00:21:47.309
go, how can I find it? RideTheWave .media is

00:21:47.309 --> 00:21:50.289
the website name and there has all the great

00:21:50.289 --> 00:21:53.410
podcasts. And once again, this is Ryan Hoppe

00:21:53.410 --> 00:21:56.289
from the Ride The Wave Media Podcast Network.