The Hammerin Hank Show TURNS 50!

WEBVTT

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What up, Hammer and Hank? If I hit the music,

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would you be ready to start the show? What's

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up, buddy? Yes, I would, buddy. All right, let

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me do it. You're listening to The Hammer and

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Hank Show with Henry Oaks and Ryan Hoppy. The

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Hammer and Hank Show. Yeah. Uh. Uh. Yeah. Hammer

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and Hank. Legend on the airwaves. What's up Hammer

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and Hank? How you doing buddy? I'm doing good.

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I actually want to give a shout out to my mom

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right now. She just texted me. I sent her the

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picture of us and she said good luck with your

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upcoming national anthem. Cool, buddy. You're

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welcome. Hammer and Hank, can you believe that

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it's been 50 shows? It's been 50 episodes. How

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crazy is that? Extremely good. How do you feel

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about it? Excellent, buddy. Would have been Some

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of your favorite memories. Our first podcast.

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What was that like? What do you remember about

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it? Our first jokes. Yeah, but I'm saying, what

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do you remember about our first podcast? I remember

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that it might be a long, long podcasting career

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for me. Yes, sir. Hammer and Hank, how the hell

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has your week been? Very good. How many times

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have you gone to jack -in -the -box and jacked

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off? I didn't jack off, but I went to jack -in

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-the -box about three times. So you've been to

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jack -in -the -box three times, but have not

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jacked off? Nope. You're doing Lord's service

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by not doing it. I've done it for you. We went

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to the old sunken. You what? We went to the old

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jack -in -the -box sunken. Do Jack, do Jack,

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do Jack. Jack in the box. Now you're cooking,

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Jack. I have not heard it, but I can assume it's

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hilarious. Are you really into jingles? Yes.

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Old radio jingles. What's your favorite radio

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jingle? I remember that one that says, you pick

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the hits here on clock AM. You're adorable. Any

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other favorite jingles? K -L -O -K clock AM.

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Were there any jingles that were either a part

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of Wild 94 .9 or on like a commercial that you

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liked? Abaddonald, we do it all for you. You're

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very smart, Hank. Hammer and Hank. Thank you,

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buddy. How is Smurfette doing? Extremely good.

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What you guys been up to? We've been eating a

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lot, talking a lot, watching a lot. Disney Channel.

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I remember Fitness and Ferb. Nice. What do you

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guys talk about? A lot of stuff. You almost said

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shit, but you're a good boy. Cool, buddy. Hammer

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and Hank, what is your radio memory of this week?

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My radio memory this week? Oh, no. I cough a

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lot. I'm battling a stupid cough right now. You

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always are. Anyway, my radio memory this week

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is when I started at Q102, which is a hip -hop

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station in San Francisco, recording public service

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announcements. I didn't know that you were at

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Q102. Yep. You're a gangsta, dude. I was only

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there for a year and a half, then I was like,

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oh, because that prick. Who? Elroy Smith. Yeah,

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he's a douchebag. He looks like a corporate moron.

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I know. He is a moron. He let me go. He said

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that it was because of budget cuts. But the truth

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is, he just wanted to get rid of me. And look

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at him now. He's some guy working somewhere,

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but he's a douche. I have heard, Hank. Any other

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radio memories? Yes. Sup? The day I went to Gwen

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Stefani concert for WandaVine back in 2007. Did

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you get to meet her? That was the last concert

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I ever attended. Did you get to meet her? What?

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Did you get to meet Gwen Stefani? Nope. That

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sucks. She would be so nice to you. She's such

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a cutie pie. Any other memories? Cutie pie. Nope.

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That's it for this week. Hammer and Hank, if

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I hit the music, are you ready for jokes? Yeah.

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Let me hit the music. Hank's joke hitting like

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a thumper from the trunk. Punch lines cracking

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louder than a cat. No punk. Ryan Hoppy rides

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shotgun with oak. Dropping these laughs. Crew

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never going broke. It's a hammering Hank show.

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Keeping it raw. Joke sharper than a blade. Cutting

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through the saw. Every segment fire. Humor like

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a burn. Tune in for the laughs. Watch the tables.

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Hi, Hank. What are your jokes this week? Why

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did I go to the gym today? Why? So I could walk

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in, look around, and leave before I peaked too

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early. Next. How did you know you're getting

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older? How? When you hurt yourself sleeping.

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Do it every night. Why did I try eating healthy

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this week? Why? Because I forgot. Mozzarella

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sticks. Assisted. Oh, they're so good. Mm -hmm.

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What's the most exciting part about being an

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adult? Why? Finding a really good parking spot.

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Next. Why am I bad at saving money? Why are you

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bad at saving money? Because every time I open

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the food delivery app, it suddenly thinks I'm

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rich. Next. What's my favorite part of the day?

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What? Taking off my shoes and realizing I survived.

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That's me every day. Why don't I chase women?

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Why? Because I get out of Brett's hallway through

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the parking lot. That was funny. What I love.

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cancel plans so much. Why do you cancel plans

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so much? Because staying home is undefeated.

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Why was I excited to buy a vacuum? Why? Because

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apparently that's what happens when you become

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an adult. And finally, why did I go to bed early

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and still wake up tired? Why? Because life likes

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To keep things interesting. And that's it for

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the jokes. Oh, Hanky, you can't hear it, but

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you'll hear it after. Oh, we got some church

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music going on. How the hell is church going?

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Extremely good. Pastor Lito led a sermon last

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week. How is that? Talks about his time in the

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Philippines. Mm -hmm. And really... A lot of

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verses in the Bible. What's your favorite verse

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in the Bible? For God so loved the world that

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he gave his only forgotten son. So whoever believes

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in him should not perish, but have eternal life.

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Oh, hell yeah. What else is going on in church?

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We're wrapping up the book of James this week.

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And my pastor John will have surgery. That's

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good. I just got attacked. Sorry, I was not paying

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attention. That was rude of me. Hammer and Hank,

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I'm playing the music right now. Hammer and Hank,

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what do you think of the NBA playoffs? NBA playoffs?

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Oh. I know the Warriors won last night. I was

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watching the game. Yeah, bro, I didn't. Now,

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you're lucky. You're on the West Coast, so it's

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earlier. I didn't get to bed until 2 .30. I was

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watching it. Okay. Okay, dude. No, I'm saying

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Stephen Curry and Draymond Green, who we've been

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very critical of last night, bro. He had some

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of the best defense I've seen him do in seven

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years, so shout out to Draymond. Shout out to

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Stephen Curry. Hell yeah, and Al Horford. He

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kept hitting those threes. That's a humiliating

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sentence tomorrow. Yeah. To secure a spot in

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the NBA playoffs. I'm sad. I'm not going to be

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able to watch that game because I have to go

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to the airport at fucking 5 a .m. because my

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mom scheduled an early morning airplane. Well,

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that's interesting. That's not that interesting.

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Hammer and Hank, did you watch the Hornets game?

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Nope. Charlotte Hornets. To tie the game in,

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Colby Wyatt hit the three and Lomelo Ball got

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the game winner. And my family's from North Carolina.

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I'm upside. It was the number one playing sports

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center. It was pretty sick. Hammer and Hank,

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what are your old TV show memories? Watching

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the old Solid Goal TV show way back in the 1980s.

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What was that show like? I liked the Solid Goal

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dancers, the music performance. And my favorite

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music performance I saw was, you know, when Al

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Franken and Tom Davis are Saturday Night Live?

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Mm -hmm. That period song, under my thumb. I

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have never heard that, but it's, wait, sorry.

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Sorry, I'm getting a text message. I'm being

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terrible today. I am so sorry. Dude, I have to

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get a, I have to get a cat sitter. That sucks.

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Wait, one second. Give me a second. Wait one

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second. Actually... No! Fuck! Actually, I have

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someone else. I thought it was that person. My

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bad. So, I applied to have a cat sitter, Hank.

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And there's a website called Rover and I applied

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for it. And I sent an invite to like six different

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people. So there's all these random numbers because

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they don't give you the actual number. I used

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to app call Rover when I went on vacation to

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Kansas. Yeah. Because my dad wouldn't let us

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take our dogs with us. Yeah, it's great. But

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the problem with it is the fact that You sign

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up and you send an invite to like five people

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and you don't know which person is which. So

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this girl just texted me and I thought it was

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somebody else. So that is my bad. Let's get back

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on track. Hammer and Hank, what is your Disney

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channel memory? My Disney channel memory is when

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I started watching the TV show Sydney to the

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Max. What was that like? It's about a junior

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high girl. They didn't hurt life away. You love

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your Disney Channel. Yep. What do you like so

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much about Disney Channel? They have a lot of

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family quality programming. That's good. I love

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it. Like Phineas and Ferb, Cindy to the Max,

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Wooly, Super Kitties. Did you like the show back

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then? Or I mean, did you like the Buzz Lightyear

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show when it was on? Yes. It was so good. I hate

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that it's not on Disney Plus. That sucks. Yeah,

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because they actually don't own it. It was made

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by a third party. Disney doesn't claim it. So

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absolutely riveting stuff. Hank, am I being a

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good host today? Yes, you are. I'm trying. Hammer

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and Hank, I feel like I'm boring you. I'm not

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boring you, right? Nope. That's good, Hammer

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and Hank. That's good. Now, do you have music

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trivia? Yes. Let me hit the music for pop culture

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trivia, all right? I know. Turn on the show with

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Henry and Ryan. Pop trivia questions, yeah, no

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lying. Got my mind sharp like a blade that's

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flying. What do you have? Who had the top ten

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hit record, Peaceful, Easy Feeling, way back

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in 1972? Steely Dan. Nope. The Eagles. Up. Next.

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That's it for music trivia. Hank, who sang the

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song Holiday Inn, or rapped? Chingy. Yes, sir.

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Let me think of another one. Who rapped the song

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Get Money in 1997? I don't know. The last person

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to be interviewed by the doghouse. Notorious.

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Biggie Smalls. Hell yeah. Notorious. B -I -G,

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bro. Biggie Smalls. Yes, sir. You're right. Who

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sang the song? I got nothing else. I'm out of

00:14:46.460 --> 00:14:49.179
it. Let me think. Hit him up in style in 2001.

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Blue Camp Trout. Hell yeah. Who sang the song

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Call Me Maybe? Carly Rae Jepsen. Who sang the

00:14:58.600 --> 00:15:03.019
song Party in the USA? Miley Cyrus. Who's the

00:15:03.019 --> 00:15:07.220
last person you jacked off to? Sabrina Carpenter.

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Hell yeah! I did it to Pornhub. Heather and Hank,

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we have a comment here. Do you have any listener

00:15:14.980 --> 00:15:19.740
comments? Nope. We have one here that says, Hank.

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You are an absolute warrior and I am proud of

00:15:23.500 --> 00:15:26.460
you for continuing the fight that is known as

00:15:26.460 --> 00:15:30.740
radio. So we have a fan for you. You're doing

00:15:30.740 --> 00:15:34.059
a good job. You're killing it. Hammer and Hank,

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I'm going to hit the buddy music and then I'll

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point to you. Let me turn it up in the club.

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All right. I know. Yo, tune in to the show. It's

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Hammer and Hank. Autistic genius always keeping

00:15:47.720 --> 00:15:50.679
it dank. Henry Oaks on the mic. Hop, ride, and

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shotgun. Roll call for the buddies. We just having

00:15:53.360 --> 00:15:55.840
some fun. Buddy of the week. Who gonna get the

00:15:55.840 --> 00:15:58.600
crown? Hank bringing smiles. Shut the haters

00:15:58.600 --> 00:16:02.299
down. On the airwaves. We breaking the code.

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Streetwise vibes on this radio. All right, Hank.

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What do you have for buddy of the week? Definitely

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Christian Boss. Who works for the disaster Roasters.

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Hell yeah. Roasters. He's trying to get me to

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sing the national anthem at one of the Roasters

00:16:20.830 --> 00:16:23.490
games this upcoming season. And then you're singing

00:16:23.490 --> 00:16:27.149
it at one. So you're already singing it at another

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team, right? That's important. On the 28th. The

00:16:31.389 --> 00:16:35.690
28th of April? Yep. Tickets on sale right now

00:16:35.690 --> 00:16:39.690
at StocktonPorts .com. Good job, buddy. Any other

00:16:39.690 --> 00:16:43.289
buddies of the week? That's it. Hammer and Hank,

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this is going to be an epic one, but let me hit

00:16:45.490 --> 00:16:47.590
the music. Are you ready for Prick in the News?

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Yep. Henry on the mic, what's this? Prick in

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the news, fools thinkin' they slick. Ryan got

00:17:00.289 --> 00:17:03.669
the scoop crew ready to expose. Shots fired dodgin'

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pigs in the petty pros. Coppers in the back,

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hoppy with that verbal machete. Every word a

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weapon, cameras rollin', y 'all ain't ready.

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Keyboard warriors actin' tough behind the screen.

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Between the lines, you get sliced like a deli

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cheese. Prick in the news, he's a thorn in your

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side. Explosin' all your lies, there ain't no

00:17:19.269 --> 00:17:22.029
place to hide. Henry Ryan dropin' facts and truth

00:17:22.029 --> 00:17:24.950
bombs. This ain't a sitcom, more like Gorilla

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Kong. I will give you the floor. Who is your

00:17:28.019 --> 00:17:32.359
prick in the news? Definitely Otis Day. Now,

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Otis Day is a guy who's done Green Bay Radio

00:17:35.599 --> 00:17:39.319
for about 30 years, and he made a parody account

00:17:39.319 --> 00:17:43.420
of a rival in his market who is a female and

00:17:43.420 --> 00:17:46.160
was harassing her and posting pictures of her

00:17:46.160 --> 00:17:48.160
and her kid without the consent and then got

00:17:48.160 --> 00:17:50.640
fired from their Kiss FM up there. What do you

00:17:50.640 --> 00:17:54.970
think of that loser? That loser definitely sucks.

00:17:55.750 --> 00:17:58.750
Big time. What do you think is the douchiest

00:17:58.750 --> 00:18:02.369
part about the guy that looks like a thumb? He

00:18:02.369 --> 00:18:06.910
looks like a thug to me. A thug? Yep. You remember

00:18:06.910 --> 00:18:10.369
Bone Thugs -N -Harmony? Hit me at the crossroads,

00:18:10.490 --> 00:18:16.089
crossroads, crossroads. Right? Okay. I'm rapping.

00:18:16.170 --> 00:18:20.529
I'm doing Bone Thugs -N -Harmony. You do it.

00:18:20.849 --> 00:18:23.390
I'll do whatever I want. Hammer and Hank, what

00:18:23.390 --> 00:18:26.450
do you think of bullies like Otis Day that always

00:18:26.450 --> 00:18:30.930
have to be douchebags? They suck. What do you

00:18:30.930 --> 00:18:32.210
think is wrong with them? Do you think they're

00:18:32.210 --> 00:18:35.509
mentally ill? Do you think they're idiots? I

00:18:35.509 --> 00:18:41.309
think they're bastards. If you could tell Otis

00:18:41.309 --> 00:18:42.849
Day one thing, because I'll tag him on social

00:18:42.849 --> 00:18:46.390
media, describe to him how much of a douchebag

00:18:46.390 --> 00:18:50.329
he is. Otis Day, you're a douchebag. You're a

00:18:50.329 --> 00:18:53.809
prick. And I'm glad you're on the radio because

00:18:53.809 --> 00:18:59.309
of the incident that occurred. Could you ever

00:18:59.309 --> 00:19:01.730
forgive Otis Day? Or are you done with that?

00:19:02.269 --> 00:19:06.220
I'm done. I have no room for bullies. It's one

00:19:06.220 --> 00:19:08.220
thing to have a radio war, but when you're posting

00:19:08.220 --> 00:19:10.779
other pictures of people and not even responding

00:19:10.779 --> 00:19:13.319
to my videos, you're a liar, you're a failure,

00:19:13.339 --> 00:19:16.200
and a coward. And you can't always trust Reddit,

00:19:16.259 --> 00:19:18.319
but from what I've read, you walk around Green

00:19:18.319 --> 00:19:20.799
Bay like you think you're the hottest thing on

00:19:20.799 --> 00:19:26.019
Earth. You are. What's up? You know, that's right.

00:19:26.859 --> 00:19:28.819
I know I'm right. I'm always right. Not at all.

00:19:29.259 --> 00:19:36.339
Otis Day! Otis Day! Go to hell. Whoa. What'd

00:19:36.339 --> 00:19:39.279
you get? What would your church think of Otis

00:19:39.279 --> 00:19:44.380
Day? He sucks. Big time. He needs some Jeebus.

00:19:44.500 --> 00:19:48.059
I mean, Jesus in his life. Otis Day. Put on a

00:19:48.059 --> 00:19:50.640
hat. You look like a thumb. Hammer and Hank,

00:19:50.759 --> 00:19:55.640
anything else? You know, this is our 50th episode

00:19:55.640 --> 00:19:58.319
of the Hammer and Hank Show of Ron and Hoppy.

00:19:58.440 --> 00:20:02.259
What do you think about that? Extremely good.

00:20:02.799 --> 00:20:06.880
Here's to another 500 more episodes. Oh, jeez.

00:20:06.920 --> 00:20:09.539
If we live that long. Hammer and Hank, anything

00:20:09.539 --> 00:20:13.500
else on your mind? That's it. All right, Hammer

00:20:13.500 --> 00:20:17.099
and Hank, let me do this real quick. Let me turn

00:20:17.099 --> 00:20:23.619
on this music. I'll get the club going. Hank,

00:20:23.799 --> 00:20:28.579
what did you think of our 50th show? It was extremely

00:20:28.579 --> 00:20:35.009
good. What was your favorite part? The jokes.

00:20:35.930 --> 00:20:39.509
The buddy of the week. What's up? The buddy of

00:20:39.509 --> 00:20:41.869
the week. And calling out that loser on his day.

00:20:42.569 --> 00:20:46.410
That's right. Hammer and Hank, next week, I might

00:20:46.410 --> 00:20:48.529
be able to record on Wednesday. Could Wednesday

00:20:48.529 --> 00:20:52.369
possibly work? That'll work just fine, buddy.

00:20:52.750 --> 00:20:55.069
Okay, it's 50 -50 because I'm going to be in

00:20:55.069 --> 00:20:58.069
Chicago, but if I can find time, we'll do it.

00:20:58.130 --> 00:20:59.849
If not, we'll have to wait two weeks, but I'll

00:20:59.849 --> 00:21:02.029
try to make it happen, okay? All right, buddy.

00:21:02.170 --> 00:21:05.930
Hammer it. Yeah, sign us off. Peace in the hood.

00:21:06.130 --> 00:21:09.609
And now you log off of Zoom. Bye, Hank. Peace

00:21:09.609 --> 00:21:27.109
in the hood. Yeah. Yo. Yo. Yo. Yo. Mike Crackle.

00:21:27.490 --> 00:21:29.779
Hammering Hank on the tackle. Autistic. Mind

00:21:29.779 --> 00:21:32.099
sharper than a bone -chilling shackle Henry Oates

00:21:32.099 --> 00:21:34.319
with the hops, Ryan hopped in the spot Radio

00:21:34.319 --> 00:21:37.180
waves hittin' hard like a chef with a pot Farewell,

00:21:37.180 --> 00:21:39.799
Hammer and Hank, gotta close up the show Legend

00:21:39.799 --> 00:21:42.660
in the booth where the vibes used to flow Autism

00:21:42.660 --> 00:21:45.160
warrior, always runnin' the glow But all good

00:21:45.160 --> 00:21:47.579
things gotta let the curtain go slow On a dial,

00:21:47.680 --> 00:21:50.240
spittin' truth with his unique grind Thoughts

00:21:50.240 --> 00:21:52.880
intertwined like graffiti on the line Ryan on

00:21:52.880 --> 00:21:55.299
the mic, Henry's rhythm divine They the blueprint,

00:21:55.680 --> 00:21:58.470
every beat they design Static in the speakers

00:21:58.470 --> 00:22:00.750
where the laughter used to ride. Hank led the

00:22:00.750 --> 00:22:03.369
show with that beautiful pride. Autism didn't

00:22:03.369 --> 00:22:06.390
stop him, not amplified. Hammer and Hank forever

00:22:06.390 --> 00:22:09.230
immortalized. Farewell, Hammer and Hank, gotta

00:22:09.230 --> 00:22:11.589
close up the show. Legend in the booth where

00:22:11.589 --> 00:22:14.410
the vibes used to flow. Autism warrior always

00:22:14.410 --> 00:22:17.029
running the glow. But all good things gotta let

00:22:17.029 --> 00:22:20.029
the curtain go slow. Radio go, never ghost. He

00:22:20.029 --> 00:22:22.309
a host with the sauce. Henry Oaks and Ryan Hart,

00:22:22.410 --> 00:22:24.789
lightning never lost. puzzle piece crown man

00:22:24.789 --> 00:22:27.210
this dude was the boss city missed the voice

00:22:27.210 --> 00:23:25.480
that's the ultimate cause never lost puzzle piece

00:23:25.480 --> 00:23:29.910
crown man this dude was the the ultimate cost.

00:23:52.200 --> 00:23:54.619
What's up? Ryan Hoppe here. And I want to tell

00:23:54.619 --> 00:23:57.720
you about the Ride to Wave Media Podcast Network.

00:23:58.160 --> 00:24:01.039
They got such great shows. It's Practically Magic,

00:24:01.359 --> 00:24:04.619
Those Guys, Blaine's World, and even my show.

00:24:05.160 --> 00:24:07.559
Hoppy Hour with Ryan Hoppy, which can be heard

00:24:07.559 --> 00:24:10.500
by searching Hoppy Radio. This podcast network

00:24:10.500 --> 00:24:14.079
is going to take over the world. It is everything

00:24:14.079 --> 00:24:16.680
that radio is missing. Now you're hearing my

00:24:16.680 --> 00:24:20.180
voice and you go, how can I find it? RideTheWave

00:24:20.180 --> 00:24:23.799
.media is the website name and there has all

00:24:23.799 --> 00:24:26.900
the great podcasts. And once again, this is Ryan

00:24:26.900 --> 00:24:32.579
Hoppy from the RideTheWave Media Podcast. Hey,

00:24:32.640 --> 00:24:35.099
what's up guys? It's Ryan Hoppe here. I host

00:24:35.099 --> 00:24:37.740
the award -winning and nationally syndicated

00:24:37.740 --> 00:24:41.319
Hoppe Hour podcast, but I'm not bragging. It's

00:24:41.319 --> 00:24:45.220
a mix of a 2000s, 1990s morning show in a podcast

00:24:45.220 --> 00:24:48.019
format. You never know what I might talk about.

00:24:48.099 --> 00:24:50.460
One minute I could be talking about the latest

00:24:50.460 --> 00:24:54.019
with the NFL side chicks, and the very next second

00:24:54.019 --> 00:24:57.400
I could be playing an unknown song from the 2000s.

00:24:57.400 --> 00:25:01.940
My show is an in -studio circus. for the age

00:25:01.940 --> 00:25:04.960
group of 18 to 34, even though we have 70 -year

00:25:04.960 --> 00:25:07.859
-olds that listen. For more info, if you want

00:25:07.859 --> 00:25:10.859
to be a sponsor, a friend, and no, not a drinking

00:25:10.859 --> 00:25:13.640
sponsor, a sponsor of the show of Hoppy Hour,

00:25:13.880 --> 00:25:18.599
go to ridethewave .media is the website, and

00:25:18.599 --> 00:25:22.759
ryanhoppyradio at gmail .com. Once again, this

00:25:22.759 --> 00:25:26.519
is Ryan Hoppy of the Hoppy Hour podcast, and

00:25:26.519 --> 00:25:27.599
let's do some business.