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Alright, without further ado, let me hit the opening. You're listening to the Hammerin' Hank Show with Henry Ochs and Ryan Hoppe. What's up Hammerin' Hank, how are you? What's going on buddy? I'm doing great.

How was your show today on KCRH? Pretty good. What did you talk about? I'm talking about the My dad who's having kidney problems right now and I'm praying for him. Yes, let's start the show.

I'm an atheist man, but because I love Hank, I will do it this time. Let's say a prayer right now. Father, son, Holy Spirit. Hank's dad is a badass. Father, son, Holy Spirit.

Hammerin' Hank, how is his condition? Not too good because he has kidney disease which runs in our family. How old is your dad? 86. Oh my goodness, that is a long life.

What is some of your favorite parts about your father? My dad, he took me to old school 107.9 Great Bend, Kansas. Four times to record autism awareness PSAs. What does he say about your autism PSAs, Hank? They were very good.

What does he like about them? The way I recorded them. Hammerin' Hank, I am going to tell you right now. On this show, we bust a lot of balls and we talk smack, but whatever you've ever wanted to say to your father, I would say this next day or so, just anything you've ever wanted to say to the man. Hey, dad, I love you so much and I hope you get better very, very, very, very, very soon.

Yes, sir. But say that to him. Have you been saying it to him? Yes, I have. Good.

That's all that matters. So let's lighten up the mood a little bit. Hank, if I hit the music, are you ready for the jokes? Yes. Let me hit the music.

All right, Hank, give us the jokes. The universe sent me a low balance alert, so I say humble. Next. People say money can't buy happiness. Yeah.

That's because they never cried inside a target with Starbucks in their hand. That's a mouthful. I know I have trust issues. Yeah. I just need receipts, timestamps and a sworn ad of it.

Not bad. My phone says my screen is screen test down, which is why because my anxiety is up. I do work on my screen time, Hank. Dean says, say, be yourself. That's how I get a match in three seconds.

I love when people say everything happens for a reason. Yeah. Yeah. Usually bad decisions and tequila. Yeah.

I try to bring mysterious. You try to be. I try to be mysterious. Yeah. Turns out I'm just quiet and overthinking in public.

That is me, bud. Therapy taught me to set boundaries. Now I just ghost people with better posture. I don't chase people anymore. I let them walk away and overanalyze it for six months.

I'm not broke. I'm just temporarily allergic to spending money without panicking. I love it. Thank you, buddy. You are quite welcome, Hammerin' Hank.

Hammerin' Hank. It says, all right, I hear. Let me load up the music because we're in church. How has church been going, Hank? Very, very, very good.

We're still in the book of James, standing, had to be a good person. And last Sunday we're to communion on the first Sunday communion, first communion Sunday of the month. Are you excited for Easter? Yes. What's your favorite part of Easter?

The jelly beans? No, the eggs. Oh, the candy eggs or real life eggs? The real life eggs. Do you paint them?

And also the candy. Do you paint the eggs? Yes, we do. Do you ever make it super kitty themed or is it just normal painting? Just normal.

Have you been watching super kitties lately? Yes. What's your favorite episode of super kitties, bud? I have too many to name. My favorite super tease person is buddy.

That sounds good. Hammerin' Hank. I want to ask you. What are your predictions? It says here, I don't know a thing about baseball, but it says here baseball spring training predictions.

What are those? I hope my Royals win the World Series this year. It's been 11 years. Crazy. 11 years.

Yes. I hope I can't say Royals, shock the baseball world and win the World Series. And anything's possible. Even though there's a team. Anything's possible.

Even though there's a team called the Dodgers that buys everybody. It's a little hard, but it's possible. I mean, you can be positive. There's no reason not to be. The Dodgers are a bunch of brats.

The doctors are? Why? Because they win too much. Oh, the Dodgers. I thought you said the doctors.

I was like, oh, the Dodgers. Yeah. Why are the Dodgers brats? Because they win too often. They should give another team a chance to win the World Series.

Like the Royals. You should tell them that. I'm sure they would totally listen. Hammerin' Hank, how much would it mean to you if the Royals won? Very, very good.

What would be so very, very good about it? That's your catchphrase. Because I want to see a Royals game this year in Kansas City. Remember the song going to Kansas City. Kansas City, here I come.

Would you be mad if I told you I've never heard that song? No, I wouldn't. No, it's okay, bud. Hammerin' Hank, if I hit the music, are you ready for pop music trivia? Yes.

Let me hear it right here. Oh, yeah. We turned it up. Turn on the show with Henry and Ryan. Pop trivia questions.

Yeah, no lying. Got my mind sharp like a blade that's flying. They asking those questions, got my brain frying. Hammerin' Hank's got the mic up high. Pop hits playing to the end of the sky.

Gotta keep it real, can't let it slide. Answers in my head, can't let them hide. Pop trivia. Yeah, we bringing the heat. All right, Hank.

What do you got? I have one question this week. Who had the top ten hand record break free back in 2014? Give me a second. Break free.

Break free. I'm thinking Lord. Ariana Grande. You love your Ariana, don't you? Yep.

What do you love about her? I wish I was here in concert this year. Yeah, I don't know if she's touring, is she? Probably not, unfortunately. Hammerin' Hank, you gotta ask, you gotta ask some of your radio friends.

You got more radio friends than me. You gotta ask them. Yo, hook it up. Yes, I think they should, some of them should join the big league orchestra. What would it mean to you if they joined that?

What would it be like? Because the big league orchestra, they had an edition of the national anthem, which is off the point of the A's games back in the day. That's freaking awesome. Are you still an A's fan or are you kind of done with them? I am truly done with them because that prick John Fisher wants to move them to Vegas and I wouldn't accept it.

Yeah, he does not get the Hammerin' Hank stamp of approval. He doesn't. That's right. Hank, what is the key to somebody getting the stamp of approval from Hammerin' Hank? I think they should ask me for the stamp of approval first.

Yes, but what's the key? How does someone get the stamp of approval? By becoming a fan of mine on Facebook. Yes, sir. And following.

Or Instagram. Following Hammerin' Hank show. Hammerin' Hank, it says here, old TV court show memories. What are yours? Mine's to people's court with my mom.

Mine is the judge with Judge Robert J. Franklin. Who the hell is that? The period court of Judge Burns and divorce court with Judge William King. Man, that shows our age gap because I think it was Jeanine Pirro or something that did divorce court when I saw it.

Hammerin' Hank. No, it was William King that did my favorite versions of divorce court back in the 80s. I understand. I was saying that we have lived different lives because to me, I think of different shows. Anyway, what were your favorite part about those shows?

The cross examinations, the cases, the yelling and screaming. Did you ever like Harvey Levin on people's court? Nope. How come? Too mellow.

I feel that, but I have her at Hank. It says all right here. What are some of your TV commercial memories? You know, the injury hotline. Yeah.

The TV commercial that aired on midday TV back in the late 80s. I love it because if you get hurt in an accident, call the injury hotline. You do. That's like your go to line. Like whenever you talk about a Warriors player being, that's like the line that you get from Hammerin' Hank.

You're guaranteed to get a line about the injury hotline. That's correct. Hammerin' Hank. What were the 80s like? The early and mid 80s were like terrible because I was in a group home with a bunch of juvenile delinquents.

I was locked up. You were locked up? I said we're gonna have to go to school. That's why you're such a legend Hank, is you've overcome adversity, bud. You did it.

Thank you. I hope I'm not done yet. Remember the Starship song? Nothing's going to stop us now. I have not, but I like it.

I like the attitude. It's good. Thank you. You're welcome. Hammerin' Hank, if I hit the music, are you ready for the thing that we are going to do unknown as Buddy of the Week?

Yes. Let me hit it. All right. Let me turn it up in the club. Yo.

Tune in to the show. It's Hammerin' Hank. Autistic genius always keeping it dank. Henry Ochs on the mic. Hot rod and shotgun.

Roll call for the buddies. We just having some fun. Buddy of the Week, who's gonna get the crown? Hank bringing smiles. Shut the haters down.

On the airwaves, we breaking the code. Street-wide vibes on this radio road. All right, Hammerin' Hank, who's your Buddy of the Week? My buddy of the Week is definitely Pastor John from the CEEFEE First Church in Castro Valley. How was church on Sunday?

Was he nice to you? He was very nice to me and also the entire congregation. And we serve communion and he's a hero of mine. That is good. Who else are your heroes?

That's it. That's it? That's a good one. Hammerin' Hank, if I hit the music, are you ready for Prick in the News? I don't have a prick in the week this week.

You wrote it down as prep. It says here, what are your thoughts on Jermell Hill? I thought of her as the prick of the week and she's the brat of the week. She's the brat of the week? Yeah.

Why is Jermell Hill, I mean, I kind of why, but why is Jermell Hill the brat of the week? Because she kind of said racist comments. Yeah. Did you see the comment? So Jermell Hill was like pretty much.

She says things without saying it. She rides the line and she was kind of saying like, oh, who wants Kevin Stefanski? They should have gone with a black coach for the Falcons, even though they just had one. And Kevin Stefanski's had good moments. And I said that she was being kind of racist.

And did you see? I think he should be the coach of the Falcons. He is the coach of the Falcons. But what I'm saying. He should remain as coach of the Falcons because he's a very good coach.

At least he's trying. Yeah. And they got Matt Ryan taking the realm. Okay. But Hank, here's my point.

Did you see that she commented on my video? I didn't see that. She said, what did I say that was racist? And I just gave it a like and read the comment the next day because yeah, that ain't racist, dog. Okay.

Anyway, it says here, you write this every week and I love it. Anything else you can think of? Is there anything else you can think of? My sister's for fat. She tries to keep me and her together in the time my dad's illness.

I hope he feels better real soon. Are you saying that you and her are close? I have a solid relationship. I have a solid friendship with her. That's good.

She's a good woman. I like that smurf fat. She's good. Is there anything? You're welcome.

Is there anything else you can think of? Yes, we should invite Selena from Walnut. Fine on the show someday. You ask her because I've tried. I've tried reaching out, heading here back, which is all good.

However, and Hank, you should reach out. You're like, Hey, you want to call my show? Thank you, buddy. Yeah, you're welcome. Take my advice.

So is there anything else on your mind? That's it. All right. Let me hit the music Hammerin' Hank. This is one of our shorter shows, but hear me out.

We have an hour of nonstop Hammerin' Hank content coming up. We have your four appearances on the wild thought podcast. Rest in peace to JV. But we're going to play an hour nonstop of Hammerin' Hank with JV Hammerin' Hank. Sign us up.

I have to say what's up to all my friends out there. I love you very much and I hope to see you right back here next week. Peace in your hood. Bye Hammerin' Hank. Goodbye.

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Hi, Hank. Hi, Hanky. Hi, everybody. We're doing good. So Hank was supposed to get that Johnson & Johnson vaccine.

Like he was next in line. They're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up. What's the latest? Are you going to get another vaccine?

No, I'd rather fucking wait until the Johnson & Johnson vaccine comes out again. Right to the cut. Very, very loyal. Sounds great. But after you got the vaccination, I wanted to take you down to get a tattoo, like a J&J on your lower back.

Do we just wait until you... Do we just wait until you get the vaccine or should we just go for it? They can do them at the same time. Yeah. No, I'd rather get an Oakland ASAC too, definitely.

No. Forget that. Hank, how do you feel about your Johnson touching another Johnson? It would be fucking good. Not the answer I expected.

I think awkward maybe or uncomfortable. Who are we to judge? We're not judging. Yeah. It would be good.

A Johnson touching your Johnson? Yes. Have you tried it, JV? No, that surprises me. I honestly thought Hank would be like, no, I'm not here for it, but I'm glad he is though.

Maybe he doesn't know. Oh, you want to talk to him about it? We're thinking. Make sure, Selena. Yeah.

Well, I mean, Hanky, do you know what a Johnson is? Where's the Johnson, buddy? It's a dick, Hank. When somebody has sex with other people. So a Johnson, that's another term for your dick.

So how do you feel about your dick touching another dick? Gently. Black hole sun, won't you come? When the hell is that out here? Are you watching TV?

It goes into Soundgarden lyrics. I'm watching Disney Juniors right now. Oh, all right. Well, turn that fucking shit off. That's how Hank would say it.

Well, turn that fucking shit off. So, Hank, answer the question. How do you feel about your dick touching another dick? I would not like it at all. Oh, you said earlier that would be great.

Yeah, he said, sign me up. And I did on a website. After somebody explained it, I would not. I would rather have pussy. I love the emphasis on the bad words.

I know. Speaking of, I saw something online. These are words that sound funny and they just sound silly. Like Uranus. Hank, have you seen Uranus?

Not in a billion years. You've never tried to take a look at it? Yes. Oh, okay. Did you use a mirror or what did you do?

I used a mirror masturbating to Miley Cyrus. Oh, and then you looked at Uranus? What? And just pictured Miley's face on there? Yes.

Words that sound funny. Pussyfoot. Pussyfoot. Yeah. What is that?

Would you like to, how do you feel about getting some pussy for your foot? That would be cool. Yeah, that would be cool. I'll take it. Words that sound funny.

Hoobastank. There was a rock group called Hoobastank. Yeah, it sounds like a stinky crotch, doesn't it? It does. The Hoobastank.

It sounds like something you did and you'd smell your finger after and you're like, yeah, she got me with the Hoobastank. Nincumpoop. Where's the Nincumpoop, buddy? That's when you go to the doctor and maybe you have an intestinal problem and they send you home with a kit and you have to bring shit back to them in a vial. You had to bring shit back to them.

Right, thank you. Oh my God. You guys. Shadow2 at Mula49, he sent over the Urban Dictionary definition of my name. Graham, I think you got yours.

Yes, somebody tweeted out mine yesterday. He sent me Selena's and then we'll look up the other ones as well. Here's the definition for Jeff. Jeff, a fabulous name. Anyone who has it should be proud.

Jeff is spontaneous, really good in bed, usually sexy, except for a few unlucky Jeffs out there. Damn, bitch. Jeff is so fine. I like that. I love it.

Selena, there's a long definition for your name and it's actually, I feel like it hits you dead on, but to save time, I'll read the short one. Selena, the coolest bitch. She's bad as hell. Talk shit, expect to get hit. Hot, pretty, beautiful.

Don't hate. She's nice to everyone. She doesn't like drama and hates the bitches. The complete opposite of a ho, slut, and whore. Get it right.

I love it. Mostly right, except the nice to everyone and hates drama part. I am nice to everyone and I don't like being involved in drama, but I like to listen to celebrity drama. Yeah, she loves to talk about drama, but does not want to be in it. I don't start it.

Exactly. I don't, you know. Graham? I think it's pretty dead on. What's your name?

Mine says Graham. A person who is generally white. He is funny and chill most of the time, but randomly rages and makes everyone laugh. Oh my God. These are so weird.

Dead on. Selena, can you share Natasha's please? Yes, I have one right here. It says Natasha is a funny down to earth girl from Hispanic or Russian descent. Everyone falls in love with her, but she's a mean bitch.

She has a dope personality, but is also crazy as fuck. She's loyal to the end, but will knock you the fuck out without hesitation if you mess with the people she loves. She's anti-social, social, crazy, goofy, and funny all at once and loves to laugh. Oh my God. Well, she loves to laugh except at our show.

Yeah. I love laughing at your show. Between 6 and 10 a.m. in the morning, she hates laughing. We'll be cracking up and thinking we're funny and she's like, oh.

Well, it takes time to. Yeah, for you guys to get funny. Yeah. OK. And then Natasha, you looked up Hank's name.

So Hank always has a great penis, but isn't a douche. Very loving, great kisser, nice, cool and can totally party. He's hilarious and can always line the mood. Wow. So hey, cool buddy.

It says you have a nice dick. Yeah. Yes, a very nice dick. Congratulations. What makes it very nice?

That's being too female pop artist. That makes it nice, huh? That's correct, buddy. All right. Please don't get mad.

This is going to be a really short Wild Thoughts podcast. We have to get out of here. There's a lot that they're throwing at us lately. We're going to eventually try to get back to these on a regular basis and a little bit longer before we leave. Hank, any shouts?

Yes, I have to give a shout to my buddy like Eagle, my dad, my sister's friend. Can you pause there a second? Hold on one second. And I know we've discussed this before. You give shout outs to people that don't listen.

But does Lucky Eagle ever listen to a podcast or the show? I tell him about it. So he doesn't listen? No, not a chance. Yes, he listens sometimes.

Oh, okay. All right. And then what about your dad? Does he listen? Nope.

Okay. All right. Go ahead and shout out all the people. And what about Buster and Marley? Buster and Marley are listening right now.

Oh, that's nice. That's good. I feel bad for him. And also to everyone in the JV fan army. Like?

Gabby, Carol, Jessica Marie, Demarie Lowe, and 68,000 more members. Okay. You should come up with that number. I made it up myself. All right, Hank.

Thank you, buddy. All right. I'll talk to you soon. Peace in your hood. Peace in your hood, buddy.

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Morning, Hanky. Hey, Hank. How you doing, man? Extremely good, buddy. Good.

Let's do the Wild Thoughts podcast. I'll bet Hank has heard of this. I'm not sure about Selena, not sure about Graham. I was telling Natasha, when I was younger, we had this white trash food called shit on the shingle. Shit on the shingle, huh?

Hey, Hank, have you heard of shit on the shingle? Sort of. So what kind of food do you think that is? I want to go fucking wild and say prison food. Essentially, probably was.

So what is it? It's like this really thick gravy and there's pieces of meat in it. And then you just pour that over two slices of toast. That was like our big white trash meal. And my mom would say, what do you want, Ray?

I don't know. How about some SOS? And we knew we were getting shit on the shingle. Would you ever see it on the- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You're telling me because one time, okay, I had to do community service and I had to like do my hours at a VFW, right?

And one of the things they served was SOS. And you're telling me that entire time it stood for shit on a shingle? Yeah, SOS is shit on a shingle. Most people that have it, they don't call it shit on a shingle that, you know, like dad would always say, we'll have some SOS. You know, when I was in the group home, I used to eat lamb and I fucking hated it.

You used to eat what, Hank? Lamb. You ate lamb and you hated it? And I fucking hated it. You'd rather eat some of the shit that was on the shingles at the group home out front.

Yeah, I could see that. So it's kind of like a shish kebab. Yeah, that would. It's what, Natasha? It's kind of like a shish kebab kind of.

No. No, it's like a nasty lumpy look. I mean, no offense to anyone whose SOS is their favorite food, but it's like this lumpy gravy and you put it on bread. Right, right, right. So you saw it, Selena?

Yes, I had to serve it to people going in there. And they were calling it SOS. Okay. It tastes really good though, you guys. It's very white trash food, but it's so good.

Like, would you ever see it on a restaurant menu? No. They're not going to have shit on the shingle. Yes, I've seen it before. You have, Selena?

Yes. And it said what, SOS? Yeah. And the waitress comes up like, how do you want your shit cooked? I'll have mine medium well, please.

I think I've seen it. I'm pretty sure. Not like a, obviously like a fancy restaurant, but something like a Denny's or something like that, you know? Yeah. So they named it that for a reason though.

Yeah, because it looks like just- Because what it looks like. Yeah, it looks like shit and some gravy and then you're just putting it on two shingles of toast. How about I put gravy in your cornflakes someday, buddy? Gravy in my cornflakes? Watch your mouth.

Look that up on Urban Dictionary. Why were you in a group home? You have a mother and father that I thought were, you know, taking care of you. I have mild severe autism. No, but still, I mean, this is going to get a little sad, but I just don't understand why.

You've been living at home forever since I've known you. Why were you ever in the group home? That was back in the 1980s and I needed help getting an education. Hmm. So it was kind of like a school.

Yeah. But did you spend the night there? I spent the night in the group home and I fucking hated it. Oh, cue the sad music. This is sad.

He's just not spending the night, Graham. He lived there. Yeah. You were like locked up there. What did you hate most about it?

The fact that I was bullied. Aww. I'm sorry, Hank. That makes me sad to hear. Let's talk about something fun.

Let's talk about your balls, okay? Yeah. Please. This morning on the JV show, we were talking about blue balls. Can you explain what that is?

What the fuck is blue balls? I want you to try to explain it. Is it the balls between your dick? Oh, those different colored ones. He's got an extra set.

He's got the blue ones between your dick. Between your dick and your what? You know, the ones between your dick and your sack and your nutsack, JV. The blue balls, the extra ones. Between your dick and your taint?

Yes. Oh. Wait, Hank, were you not listening to the JV show this morning? Yes, I was. You guys, I will send his ass.

Because I have a fucked up memory. Oh, yeah. I was about to threaten to send him back to the group home if he wasn't listening. No. Just kidding.

Hank, that's just a joke. If you ever need a place to stay, Graham has told me several times you can live with him. Yeah, I'd be happy. We just got a new big house in Napa. It's so beautiful.

They call it Just Kidding, Just Kidding. Yeah, I was just kidding. I don't have any room at my house, so I'd be happy to drive you over to Selena's. She said you could stay as long as you want. Yeah, that's nice of her.

And then I'll call you an Uber to Natasha's. Natasha, do you want to explain to Hank what blue balls are? It's something that's painful that happens when a man and a woman, they start making out and nothing happens. Or a man and a man. Hold on.

Or a man and a man. When a man and a woman start making out. But nothing happens, so nothing gets released out of the stuff area. The dick hole. I think that's what she's trying to say.

It's the Wild Thoughts podcast. Nothing gets released out of the dick hole. So when nothing gets released. No, that's a problem except for that. Yeah, it's backed up and they're like a goddamn traffic jam.

Yes, and it... Hank, have you ever had it kind of like, you know, you haven't released it in a long time so it starts to hurt and you're nuts? Yes. Because I'm not a female pop artist. And sometimes, cum comes out of it.

Yeah, but other times, your mom, you know, somebody in your family walks in on you and you have to stop. But man, that hurts, am I right? You're one billion percent crutch, JV and buddies. Uh-huh. And it's my understanding that you then turned that into shit on the shingle.

Oh my God. Wait, so it hurts if you guys have to stop it? Oh yeah. Yeah, that's the worst kind of... That's the worst kind of blue balls.

Not a gradual buildup of not having sex over a couple of weeks or something. It's the buildup of like JV was talking about earlier where, yeah, there's a lot of fooling around and then it stops. And then it doesn't come out. Then it's going to back up into areas and that's what causes all the pain. Yeah, but can some of it come out but then some of it not?

Like, can you stop midway? Like, what do you... Yeah. I think it's more of a hard stop. That doesn't stop midway?

No, those don't stop midway. No, it's... This is stopping prior. It's like having a bullet in the chamber. You never pull the trigger.

Right. It's not coming out. So now it's going into that word that Selena was talking about, the epididia. That has to do with it now going into different areas of your ball sack. Well, because all the sperm in there, they're like cheering like, holy shit, this is about to happen.

And they're all bouncing off each other, all super excited, like, fuck yeah, we're getting out of here. They got nowhere to go. And then the door never opens. So then they just start banging on all the walls like, get the fuck out of here. You told us we were going.

Let me out. So when I went to ER, that's what was going on, a big fight in my balls. Dude, millions of sperm in there. Royal Rumble, JV, they're so pissed off that they didn't get to go where they thought they were going to go, that they're in there fighting each other. That's where all the pain stems from.

All right. Please re-explain that, Hank. It's like a man, woman having to masturbate to female artists. And they almost get it, but they fucking don't. And then what's the fight in the balls?

The fight in the balls? Is it when you punch someone's dick? Yeah. Okay. There it is.

What do you got, Graham? All right. So I read this research study on what the average amount of time couples have sex is, like how long does it last? So if you've ever wondered like, how long are people doing it? Cause some people are like, oh, we have sex for hours.

I'm like, bullshit. So they had 500 couples from around the world time themselves with a stopwatch. You only started the stopwatch once the penis had entered the vagina. Penetration. Then you could hit start on the stopwatch and you only hit stop when it was finished and they found the average amount of time across all 500 couples was 5.4 minutes.

I kind of wanted to ask the ladies how they felt about that 5.4 minutes. But keep in mind, that's just the average. The times range anywhere from 33 seconds up to 44 minutes was the longest. Okay. What do you guys think about that amount of time?

Five minutes. I thought the average would be a little bit longer, but I mean, I'm not, I guess. Yeah, it's fine. It's fine. Five minutes is a long time.

I mean, I feel like it's not a long time. I feel like you're showing off after minute one. I thought the average would be like between like 10. I thought I'd like to turn off after minute two, buddy. What do you say, Natasha?

That's fine. Oh, that's fine. Wow. What? It's, I guess it just depends on the situation.

I feel like anything past five minutes, you're trying to do too much. Right. You know, you think even 10 minutes is doing too much. I mean, it's just 10 minutes. I think 10 minutes, the entire, the entire show, the foreplay, the whatever, 10 minutes.

But the actual, the actual. Graham, you're including foreplay and the whole deal should be done in 10 minutes. That's a 10 minute window. But the actual Pound Town, come on, 10 minutes. I can get it done twice in that amount of time.

I put a survey on Twitter. I said foreplay should last longer, last less time or be eliminated. And how do you think the results came in? Longer. Last longer.

Yeah. I must have a lot of female followers because I was expecting a lot of guys to say, eliminate it. Let's get right to it. What the fuck? Yeah.

It was like a 70% said they want foreplay to be longer. Yeah. I think a lot of ladies want a little more time to warm up before the skin boat gets docked in Tuna Town. Like you want things to, you know, get the heat, the passion at the moment. So weird that you have to warm up.

I mean, for a guy, all you have to do is look at it. Yeah, we're very different. Like, and that's why it's so weird to me that guys don't understand that. There's a lot of guys out there that are like, what's that for? Why do we have to do that?

Like, can we just not? Like, I don't know. It's just, it's so weird. It is weird. What is it for?

Yeah. Yeah. Can you explain what, what's that all about? Why can't we just fuck? Why do you have to warm?

I've got to warm up. You're not like an old school car. If you're asking what is it for, then you're not doing it right. I think we should fuck too, buddy. Oh, you and JV or you and Graham.

He hanged us through his hat in the ring. No, me and a lovely female. Oh, who were you talking to when you said it? Selena. It was Selena and Natasha.

Which one? I was talking to a random female person. Like somebody listening to this. Maybe somebody listening to this. I don't want to fuck a random female.

Hold on. So wait, you would rather do a rando than me. Yeah, that's mean. No, I'd rather do Selena. Oh, there it is.

Thank you. So how do you imagine you and Selena doing it? On her Bowflex. Hugging, hugging and more hugging. Oh, so romantic.

That's really nice, Hank. Thanks, buddy. Anything else here? I was reading about this girl named Sid Wilder, who I guess is like pretty poppin' on OnlyFans. She's been on the platform for about a year and supposedly now she's part of like the top 0.6% creators.

Like she is up there, up there. And she was talking about how she got started. It really all stemmed from a breakup. Like her and her man were going through a breakup and he made a mean comment to her like, well, why don't you just join OnlyFans then? And she was like, I will.

And she did. And she became super successful off of it. If you were the ex, would that piss you off hearing that? Like you tried to insult her and here she is, like making all this money and she's just blown up since then. Probably a little bit.

Yeah. Yeah. I'd be so mad. Hank, are you going to get an OnlyFans account going? I'll think about it, buddy.

You should do it. What? I think Tyga, Chris Brown, they got one going. All they do is... No, Olivia Rodrigo.

Oh, you like Olivia Rodrigo? Wow, you like the young ones. No, but I'm just saying you don't have to have sex with these guys. I'm saying they started in OnlyFans and they just sit there jacking off and people pay for it. I'd jack off to Olivia Rodrigo.

Okay, you can do that, I guess, on your OnlyFans and you get paid for it. But the other thing I'm thinking... I do not know that until now. The other thing I'm thinking that people would pay big money for is if we went to your dad's TV and got his remote and shoved it up your ass. I'm subscribing now.

Would you be willing to do that, Hank, for big money? No. I'd rather be a contestant on Wheel of Fortune. Yeah, but this is going to keep you out of the group home. That other dream won't.

If you want it, you can get it. If I want what? To shove the TV remote inside the family's... Oh, I won't want it after you shove it up there now. But if you do want it, you can get it, JV.

By the way, Natasha has no jealousies or worries about me seeing other chicks. She will show me girls that we know or that were friends with her. They have only fans accounts now and they are doing all kinds of crazy stuff. And she's like, hey, check this out. Oh, look what she's doing.

Selena, could you show these ladies to your man? I don't know. I'm not showing you to be like, get all like, you know, worked up on. Get your blue balls. Yeah, I'm showing you like, look.

I'm not showing you to be like, oh, go to the other... Selena, would you be jealous showing other like, you know, hot chicks to AJ who are doing all these things? No, I wouldn't. No, I wouldn't. And I feel like I can't think of an instance where he would have junk just pulled up on his screen.

But if it was like, like he'll show me all the time, like people that he follows on Instagram from like back home or whatever, who are like, you know, twerking or they're showing stuff or whatever. He'll show me, like, look at her. And, you know, so we do have that kind of relationship, but not with junk. What about Kate showing you some chicks? Would never happen.

No. She doesn't even know what the site OnlyFans is, I imagine. You don't think so? I bet she does. And she would never in a million years show you two chicks going at it.

Not a chance. Why not? That's just not who she is. That is not her personality. And it would seem very out of character if she did show that to me.

I would be like, are you feeling OK? What's wrong? Would you look at it or would you be embarrassed? I would look away, JV. When Natasha shows me, when Natasha shows me, I'm like, oh, yeah, yeah.

You know what I mean? I don't want her to like think, oh, look at me. I'm all into this. So I just look away. Oh, yeah, no, I would look.

Oh, yuck. Ew, gross. No, don't show me that. That's so gross. Why are they doing that to each other?

Yeah. Show me that again. Why is she doing that one too? All right. We're going to get out of here.

Hank, you want to give some shout outs to all the people that don't listen to this? Yes, I'd like to give a shout out to my buddy, like, Eagle, my dad, my sisters for fat, my dog, Buster, and Marley. Sometimes they call Marley Chompstar. Everyone in the JV Show fan army. And also my buddies in both great bands and in Russian or Kansas.

And my buddies at the Rush County News, which is a weekly newspaper based in ZCross, Kansas. Also, before we go, why don't you tell everyone at that group home that was mean to you to suck a fat dick? Yes. Suck a fat dick to everyone in the group home. Do you remember some names of people that weren't nice to you?

Yes, one person. Who was it? Mike. Mike, I hate that guy. Fucking bastard.

I'll kick the shit out of Mike if I ever see him. Yeah, if we see Mike, we're going to fuck him up, Hank, OK? Or Reggie. Or Reggie. Fuck you, Reggie.

Mike and Reggie. These assholes. Son of a bitches. Alright, Hank, love you, buddy. I love you all so much.

Peace and new hood. And I'll listen to the JV Show tomorrow on 1-8-9. Is blurry vision slowing you down? Cataracts can make it hard to enjoy life's precious moments. At the Eye Associates, we can help you see clearly.

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Open to high schoolers age 16 and older. Hank, what's up buddy? What's going on, JV? How are you? Selena, Natasha, and Graham.

Hi Hank. What's going on buddy? Hey Hanky. Bumped up. Hank.

Yes. Do me a favor here. I just read something online. Man completes the largest jigsaw puzzle in the world. Will you please explain to Selena, because a jigsaw puzzle will get her panties wet.

And you know what that means, right? Yes. Explain it. I would have come out of her prussies. What's up Hank?

Easy there, guy. But kind of. Not quite. I don't know who wants to explain that part. Natasha.

Graham does. Oh, Natasha does. Great. What? No, will you do me a favor Hank?

Will you please explain to Selena jigsaw puzzles are stupid. Jigsaw puzzles are stupid because they take too fucking long to complete. Hanky, why? They're still so much fun. Hank, come on.

You enjoy a good puzzle. Doing a puzzle, I would complete baseball puzzles. Yeah, baseball puzzle. There you go. And just literally just a white baseball with the red seams.

Yeah, that's not boring. That's good enough. Yeah, the two most boring things in the world combined. Baseball and a puzzle. I also read 41% of online voters believe that science will someday cure baldness.

Do you guys think that'll happen? What's taking them so long? You would make so much money coming up with the cure for baldness. Yeah, but they've been working on this pesky cancer thing and all this other stuff. Who cares about that stuff?

Cure baldness. I guarantee they'll do it. I don't think they'll find out a way to cure it because it's like in your DNA. It's a genetic thing and you either have it or you don't. But I think they'll find a way to be able to grow it back.

No, that would be the cure. They're already editing genes and taking they can take out the baldness gene. And that is the answer. Like, why aren't they getting to that? Yeah, get in the DNA.

You just shave your head like you shave your nuts. I will never shave my fucking nuts. How do you explain the receding hairline on your nut sack then? It's genetic, right? If I look at my dick.

He's just trying to be as shocking as he can. Have you ever shaved your nuts, Hank? Never. Why not? You're just going to let that hair grow all crazy?

Nope. I'll get a chance to shave it when it's my turn. When it's your turn. I get the vaccine line. Let's see what the eligible groups are to shave their nuts this week.

Looks like Contra Costa is the 50 and up right now. Solano County, we're at the 40 and up. So if you got hairy nuts, go down to the clinic center. We're in the red tier with those red balls. So Hank, you would want someone to do it for you?

Yes. Like a barber? No, a lovely female. Oh, get a female to shave your nuts. That sounds fun.

Hope she has a steady hand. Yes. Yes. I thought we would have Graham take over on Urban Dictionary and throw out some terms and have Hank do his best to guess his way through it. And if he doesn't get it, then Graham can explain what the terms mean or the phrases.

What do you got first, Graham? All right, Hanky, do you know what a rusty trombone is? What is a rusty trombone? Yes, what I asked you. Take a guess, what do you think it is?

It's something nasty. I think it's a man's dick. It's involved, yeah. And it's just rusty. Ew, why is it rusty?

What is that? It's my rusty trombone. What is it, Graham? It's when a guy gets a rim job and a hand job at the same time from the same person. Looks like the giver is playing a trombone there with a rusty brown mouthpiece.

Oh. Oh, that's interesting. That's interesting. What else? Hanky.

Would you like to try that? Hank, yeah, would you like to try the rusty trombone on me? Yes, I would. Thank you. All right.

What else, Graham? Hanky, do you know what a blumpkin is? What is a blumpkin? Take a guess. A blumpkin is when a female and a male have oral sex at the same time.

Have oral sex at the same time? That would be like a 69. That's a 69. A blumpkin is when a guy receives genital stimulation whilst simultaneously taking a shit. Taking a shit, huh?

It's like clean with circulation? Well, depends how far along you are into the shit, of course. That is so gross. What, you've never gotten a blumpkin, JV? No.

Oh, come on, you haven't lived. Hank, have you ever masturbated while you're taking a shit? Ew. No, but I've masturbated in the shower to Britney Spears, Selena Gomez, Camila Cabello, or Olivia Rodrigo. Right.

Oh my God, when she was 18, right? She just turned 18. Yeah, like a week ago. Olivia. So this is recent.

That was very recent. Who cleans up that shower? I do. What do you use on it? I use Formula 409.

How often do you, be honest, when's the last time you used some 409 on that thing? 1997. No, about two weeks ago. Oh, okay. All right, that's good.

What's the next one, Graham? All right, Hanky, do you know what an Alaska pipeline is? Where's the Alaska pipeline? I don't know, buddy. It's when one person shits a nice long turd, freezes it, and then uses it to fuck another person either in the pussy or in the ass.

Who does it to things? It's when a person wants to fuck another person with the shit. Jesus, this part quit. This is too much, Urban Dictionary. Hank, would you like to try that one?

On Graham? I'll love to try it someday. On Graham, okay. Yeah, I mean, everybody should try everything once, right? You're on Katy Perry.

Oh, I'm gonna send her this audio file. Even when she had the short haircut? Me and haircut, buddy. Hanky, are you learning all this nasty, bad stuff? Like, who are you learning this from that you know?

Us. From Graham. From Arnie Prine? Yeah, from us. When you guys sit down with the family at the dinner table and you talk about your day, do you talk about Blumpkins, Alaska pipelines, and rusty trombones with your family?

Fuck no. Okay, good. Hank, so explain, we're gonna do a little recap, little quiz here. What is the Alaska pipeline? When a boy and a girl shit his pants.

Okay, good. What's a Blumpkin? A Blumpkin is when a man massages a girl. Okay, and what was the other one, Graham? The rusty trombone.

What's the rusty trombone? The rusty trombone is a puzzle. Is that close enough? Yeah, it's a baseball puzzle. Yeah, it's puzzling why anybody would do that.

By the way, that would be cool if Hank did the old Alaskan pipeline down at his Modesto Nuts audition. Oh yeah. That would set you apart from the other contestants. True. That would be so true.

Did you guys hear that? Is that dog barking? Yeah, I'm walking in my hood right now. Hank, you live in the hood? You consider it the hood?

I consider it trailing on my hood. My hood, okay. Graham, do you have any more of these? Yeah, I mean, what do you guys wanna go with? Donkey punch, furry sausage wallet, the Houdini or the San Diego surprise or a dirty Sanchez?

Ooh, let's go with the Houdini. Hank, do you know what a Houdini is? What is a Houdini other than a rap group Houdini? According to Urban Dictionary, it's when a man reaches climax whilst in the doggy style position, the man pulls out, spits on their partner's back, fooling them into thinking that he's ejaculated. However, when their partner turns around, the man lets loose the baby yogurt in his partner's face.

Again, this is Urban Dictionary, not me. That sounds like a English ejaculation. Oh. Natasha, can you explain the Houdini? Explain that back.

Oh, sorry, I thought it was something else. Oh, Natasha's never paying attention. Wouldn't any guy actually do that? On Bart, yeah, I've done that. In college.

You probably thought I really did that, I didn't. I was just, it was a joke. I was just kidding. And then you do it though, right? Whammy.

In the face. Any others, Graham? I mean, you tell me, San Diego Surprise, furry sausage wallet, Donkey Punch, or the Dirty Sanchez? Hank, you can probably work out the furry sausage wallet, right? That one's pretty self-explanatory.

What is it? It's what a man massages with a stick to lovely females. Not quite. I know your go-to answer on everything. What is it, Graham?

The furry sausage wallet is exactly what you would think it is, it's a vagina. You ever had one of those, Hank? For lunch. On Bart. A long time ago.

Oh, you did? When a female set my dick at the sound factory. Who set that up? My old buddy, Jose. Wow, wow, that's generous.

Do you remember her name? No, I don't because it was too fucking long ago. There's a point where you're too big of a fan of Wild 94.9. Oh my God. That's officially it.

You're a little bit too big of a fan. Was that the dog barking or Hank laughing? Another dog barking. There's a lot of dogs in your hood. Yeah, there's a lot of dogs in my hood.

All right, Hank, anything you want to talk about? I'd like to give a shout to everyone at the James Show Wild 94.9. My dad and my sister, Sherifat, my buddy, Lucky Eagle, everyone in the JV fan army, and also my extended family in both Great Bend and in Rush, Kansas, and also to my buddies at the Rush County News. All right, good job, Hank. You know, whoever you shout out on this podcast, we have to send it to them.

Yeah. All right. Do you want us to send the news channel to this podcast? I'll title this one Rusty Trombone. It's a newspaper.

Okay. Would you like the newspaper to hear you talking about a rusty trombone? No, I don't. That's gonna be a problem. I already hit send.

Oh, shoot. That will be the day. Do you think that paper that he's talking about even has email though? No, they still print that thing on a fucking typewriter. It's a very, very small town.

Very small town. All right, Hank, we out, man. All right, I'll talk to you soon. Love you, buddy. Love you, buddy.

Okay, bye-bye. Bye. Bye. Shopping with your parents can be embarrassing. Why would they sell jeans with holes in them?

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We're your partner in eye health. Our expert team provides everything from comprehensive eye exams to advanced treatments like LASIK, cataract surgery, and glaucoma care. Whether you need vision correction, specialized treatment, or routine eye care, trust us to protect and enhance your vision. Our top priority is your health and comfort. Call us at 866-865-2020 or visit siteforlife.com.

Discover the difference of expert care right here in Southwest Florida. Is blurry vision slowing you down? Cataracts can make it hard to enjoy life's precious moments. At the Eye Associates, we can help you see clearly. Our team of experienced surgeons are at the forefront of advanced eye care.

Combining expertise with cutting edge technology, we consistently deliver exceptional results to the latest advancements in cataract surgery. Say goodbye to cloudy vision and hello to clear, vibrant sights. You can book your consultation with the Eye Care Associates by calling 866-865-2020 online at siteforlife.com. All right, here we go with the Wild Thoughts podcast. I was talking with Hank last night and he said he wanted to join us.

So let's bring him on. Hank, what's up, buddy? Good morning, JV. Good morning. Do you want to say good morning to everyone else here?

Good morning, everyone. Natasha, Graham, and JV, and Natasha, and Selena. Oh, there she is. I got three mentions before he got to Selena. That's great.

I was the last one. So some sad news, you guys, regarding his audition with the Modesto Nuts. Oh no, what? They had to cancel because of the stupid COVID-19 outbreak. Oh, because you were going to be a super spreader.

And your singing was going to spread it to everyone or just in general. My guess is while he's singing and all that spit's going everywhere. Right. Is that what it was, Hank? No.

I don't know if he'll have the same reaction, but I'll try to ask it again and see if I get it, because it was a great response last night. Hank, what do you think if they change the name of the Modesto Nuts to the Modesto Nut Sacks? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Good one.

Was that the same reaction? Yes. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Let's get into a couple of stories here, Hank. A man got pulled over by an officer in Florida, and the officer was like, you need to give me the gun, give me your gun.

And the guy said, I don't have a gun. And the cop keeps frisking him. And he's like, you pull the gun out of your pants. It actually wasn't a gun. What do you think it was?

It was a Nutsack. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Good one. Yeah, it was his junk, Hank. That's cool, buddy.

Ha ha ha ha. Was it like a handgun size, or are we talking rifle size? And I think it was a really big gun, where it was like threatening the community. Yeah, the long gun. Yeah.

I think it was his dick. Yeah, there you go. Do you ever call it a cock, Hank? Nope. Why not?

I don't know. You know, just for fun, and it's like you're just playing an actor, why don't you say something to Selena along the lines of, you know you want this big cock. Hey, Selena, I know you want this big cock. Ha ha ha ha ha. I don't know how to respond to that.

Oh, no response. Just say you do. Ha ha ha ha. Yeah, so let's try it again. Hey, Selena, I know you want this fucking cock.

That was even better. Guys, don't think you can say that. Selena, get in character. You say, yes, I do. And Natasha, he loves this.

He hits me all the time. We talk every day, and he hits me all the time going, JV, I think, or JV, I want to do the Wild Thoughts podcast. And he wants to rename it. He has a name that he wants to call it, share it with everyone. The Con Spot.

Wait. What? What? That's how I shrink to it. Why do you want to name it that?

Why? Like, what's your reasoning, Hank? We should do one JV's podcast titled The Con Spot. I swear to God, I didn't give him any, I haven't even responded to him yet, but every few messages he'll say, hey, how about we name the Wild Thoughts podcast The Con Spot. I love it.

It's a spot that everyone can come together and listen. I think this is why Hanky. Pop stars. Please, we can come Masterbate. Right, you pop on our podcast and everyone starts jerking off.

Of course, you can use it for whatever you want. Hanky, do you really do that to pop stars? I'm not such a Britney Spears, Camila Cabello, Tristan Galera. Yes, Natasha, he really does. You really do.

Like, what about to Olivia Rodrigo? She just turned 18. I'm asking to her sometimes. That's cool. That's cool.

Like what, Natasha? Nevermind. No, go ahead. No, I shouldn't ask. It's the Wild Thoughts, nothing is off limits.

It's the Con Spot, come on. Yeah, come on now. What type of motion are you conducting when you're thinking- I stand off with my hand and sometimes the cum comes out of my dick. Oh my God, okay. Wait a minute, why sometimes, does it sometimes come out of your ear?

Well, if it's backed up enough. Does that make you happy? Yes, I clean out my clothes and put them in the laundry. They stick to the side of the hamper. Wait, Natasha, what kind of motion were you expecting him to do?

Why are you trying to call him out? He was very honest about what he did and to what pop stars, but why do you need to know the exact motion? I mean, we can all- Are there different motions? I thought it was pretty straightforward. Yeah.

So who taught you how to do this motion? Like did you just learn it on your own or did you- Yes, I did. You did, you figured it out. How old were you when you discovered it? About 17 or 18.

Do you remember what your first time, who it was to? Celine Dion. The female artist in the Solid Goat TV show audience. The whole audience got some. Oh, wow.

Just the female members. Oh, I wasn't implying the guys, but that's cool that you gave the whole audience some of that. Yep, I was at the taping though, I was at home. Okay, good, yeah, because if you're at the taping of the show and you whip it out and start spraying the audience, I can see you probably get kicked out. Yeah.

Speaking of, this is back in the VCR days. Would you like pop in a VCR of the audience or what? Yes, I would, buddy. Oh, you had them recorded. No, I wish I had a VCR back in the day, but we are plain broke.

Oh, sorry to hear that, Hank. So another story here, a guy used his debit card to break into a house and then he left it behind. So cops were like, oh, you, so then they went and busted him. Speaking of debit cards, Hank, when you were in the The Doghouse, a lot of firsts for you. I mean, we tried a lot, a lot of things with you.

Did we ever chop up a little cocaine with a card and have you to give it a sniffer? Oh my God. Oh my God. No, I'm stunned, I'm really shocked. I'll never try cocaine.

Good for you, Frankie. Wait, did it happen? But maybe try it before you jack off one time, you know what I mean? Do it on your dresser. Why not?

Because I say no to illegal drugs. Good. What about weed? I don't smoke weed. We used to drink a little bit though, right?

Didn't you have some hard drinks? Yes, I did, but I had to quit because I'm on psychiatric meds. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, you can't mix those. That doesn't mix so well.

I bet it would work well with the cocaine though. Mm-mm. I got any word, buddy? I'm kidding, Natasha, these are all jokes. These are jokes.

This is the KompSpot podcast. Probably wasn't a joke back when we were trying to talk him into doing a line, but hey. No, of course not. They're jokes now. You remember that old line that safe sex is the rule.

Bag it. Safe sex is the rule, bag it. Yeah, bag it up. Sometimes you gotta double bag it. You are getting into something nasty if you gotta.

Did you ever try to convince Graham to do it? No. Never. I think Graham was too young for that stuff, right? Oh, I mean, he was around, but I never partook.

I'm with Hanky, no drugs. Just say no to drugs. Say no to drugs. Also, double bag your dick. Double bag your dick, buddy.

Hey, double bag your dick, buddy. I got a list here. We'll handle this and then we'll let you go, Hank. A things men shouldn't do after 30. So we'll see how all the guys are doing with it and ladies, you can comment.

You shouldn't be eating fast food after 30. I like to have fast food once a week still. I love to have fast food after a while. You love what, Hank? I love to have fast food after the age of 30.

Oh, you'd love to have it after 30, gotcha. Yeah, he's still. How often do you eat fast food? Approximately once a week. I think once a week is okay.

What about you, Graham? I'm probably less than once a week, but if I'm on a road trip or driving somewhere, I'm not gonna not have fast food, but I definitely don't have it once a week, but I do love it. Remember the old Jack in the Box slogan? Do you Jack, do you Jack, do you Jack, Jack in the Box? Now you're cooking, Jack.

I like that, try it again, but say Jack off after each one of the Jacks, go for it. Do you Jack, do you Jack, do you Jack, Jack in the Box? Now you're cooking, Jack off. Well, no, like. Okay, try it again, but this time add the word off.

After each word Jack. After every time you say Jack, then say Jack off. Do you Jack, do you Jack, do you Jack off, do you Jack off, do you Jack off? Now you're cooking, Jack off. There you go.

Nice, nice. The answer to all those questions is yes. Things men shouldn't do after 30, driving recklessly. I don't do that anymore. Hank, do you ever get to drive?

I never got to drive because I don't want to. You haven't ever wanted to, huh? Nope. Oh my God. Oh, Graham, I don't think you had joined the show yet when we wanted Hank to have a driving experience.

We weren't even in this building. We were over on Green Street and the parking lot was up high on the roof and he got in it and he got confused. Sorry, I brought a go-kart. No, we were on Francisco. Yeah, on Green Street.

And yeah. Yeah, that's what I said. He got confused with the go-kart between the gas and the brake. And what happened, Hank? I almost fucking injured myself.

Oh no. You guys. Oh my God. The parking lot was one of those open ones and hardly a barrier at the edge. And then it went over.

He almost went over the building. I'm not kidding. Whoa, scary. Like that sat with me for so long. If I would've injured myself, I would've called the injury hotline.

Oh, you'd be dead. And I would be done with radio. That's for sure. You can't go killing people over your experiments. Yeah, your family would've gotten paid out nicely though, Hanky.

What do you think they would've spent all the money on? Food. Yeah, I'm gonna go, I'm gonna say Slim Jim's and beer. Just to celebrate. To celebrate?

Celebrate what? That's correct. To have a deal with Hank? What do you mean? Well, I mean your financial windfall, of course, after you've gotten done mourning and then you pop down and get a couple of celebratory Slim Jim's.

Hank, how about this? A Slim Jim, a beer, a line of Coke, and then you ride that go-kart over the building again. I can't do that. See, he knew I was kidding. Things you shouldn't do after 30 playing video games every day.

Oops, Selena. What? You got one of those at the house. I do, but I don't mind it. Yeah.

You know, it's not his whole life. Do you play video games? I play Pac-Man every once in a while. Pac-Man, huh? That's the only video game I would fucking play.

You fucking tell him, Hanky. Put some emphasis on that. Put some respect on his Pac-Man. You shouldn't after 30 get a tattoo. Hank, you got a doghouse tattoo, right?

That's correct. Did you enjoy it? Oh my God. I enjoyed it. But I would have had an Okanay tattoo also.

We can do that. Yeah, do you want me to get you one? I can hook you up with one. Yes, an Okanay tattoo because I'm a big Okanay fan. You got it.

We're gonna hook it up. We know the best tattoo artist in San Francisco. You wanna have Lucky drive you up to the city and then you can get the tattoo? Yeah. Things you shouldn't do after 30, guys.

Living paycheck to paycheck. Are you living paycheck to paycheck, Hank? I'm trying to get back into the workforce, buddy. Wait, do you get a check from the government, though? Yes, I do.

Are you managing that okay? Slim Jims and beer, JV. Yeah. My sister is. Oh, your sister is ripping it off from you?

No, she's printed in the last national bank. That is good. Good. You got a savings. They went out of business eight years ago.

Don't tell him that. The last national bank. That's why they called it. It was the last one. It was in Fremont and it's gone belly up.

You might wanna follow up on your money. Things you shouldn't be after 30, socially or politically clueless. Hank, how do you feel about politics? I don't like politics. Why not?

Because some of the politicians behave badly sometimes. Yeah, starts too many arguments, huh? Yep. What do you think of Biden? He isn't okay, President.

Okay. What do you think of Trump? President, I've rat Donald Trump. Oh, he doesn't like Donald Trump. Neither does my sister or my dad.

Why did I think your dad did? Because nevermind, I can't say it. Oh boy. All right, one final one you shouldn't do guys after 30, dress like a slob. What do you think, Hank?

I don't dress like a slob. I wear baseball jerseys most of the time or basketball jerseys and shorts. So you don't dress like a slob, but you mostly wear jerseys and shorts. What jersey would you wear if you were invited to a wedding? I wouldn't wear a jersey.

Oh, Hank looks good in the tux. When he's all dressed up, he looks really sharp. I would have said Ricky Henderson, but whatever, if you guys wanna wear tuxes, you nerds. I would wear a suit, buddy. All right.

Yeah, Hank looks really nice in a suit, don't you, Hank? Yes, I do. All right, Hank, you did another fantastic job on the Wild Thoughts podcast. Would you like to give any shout outs? Any shout outs?

Yes, I'd give a shout out to my friend Lucky, my dog, Mr. Marley, my sister, Shrafet, my dad, and everyone in the Wall 94.9 JV Show fan army. Wow, no specific names, huh? Everyone, I love them very, very, very, very, very much. So no specific names.

Yeah, what about all your family in Great Bend, Kansas? What, you wanna tell them about the Cum Spot? I also had to give a shout out to families in Great Bend, Kansas and in Rush Center, Kansas, and also to my buddy, he said the Rush K News, which is a newspaper headquartered in Vacrosk, Kansas. Do you think that guy at the news station or any of your relatives would like to listen to the Cum Spot? I doubt it.

Oh. Should we send it to them? Thank you. Yes. I'll send them the link.

Send them the link. All right, Hank, love you, buddy. I love you too. Talk to you later. Peace in your hood.

Peace in your hood. Bye. Sofi.com slash power to learn more. That's Sofi.com slash P-O-W-E-R. Loans originated by Sofi Bank NA.

Member FDIC, terms and conditions apply, and MLS 696891. Ha, yeah, yo. Yo, yo, yo. Mike Crackle, hammering Hank on the tackle. Autistic mind sharper than a bone chilling shackle.

Henry Ose with the hops, Ryan Hop in the spot. Radio waves hitting hard like a chef with a bot. Farewell, hammering Hank, gotta close up the show. Legend in the booth where the vibes used to flow. Autism warrior always running the glow.

But all good things gotta let the curtain go slow. Ola Dow, spitting truth with his unique grind. Thoughts intertwined like graffiti on the line. Ryan on the mic, Henry's rhythm divine. They the blueprint, every beat they design.

Static in the speakers where the laughter used to ride. Hank bled the show with that beautiful pride. Autism didn't stop him, not amplified. Hammering Hank forever immortalized. Farewell, hammering Hank, gotta close up the show.

Legend in the booth where the vibes used to flow. Autism warrior always running the glow. But all good things gotta let the curtain go slow. Radio go, never ghost. He a host with the sauce.

Henry Ose and Ryan Hop, lightning never lost. Puzzle piece crown, man, this dude was the boss. City missed the voice, that's the ultimate cause. souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent souvent Cameron Hank gotta close up the show Legend in the booth where the vibes used to flow Autism warrior always running aglow But all good things gotta let the curtain go slow Radio gate never ghost, he a host with the sauce Harry Ochs and Ryan Harp, lighten never lost Puzzle piece crown, man this dude was the boss City Mr. Voice, that's the ultimate cost The Ride The Wave Media Podcast Network They got such great shows, it's practically magic Those guys, Blame the World and even my show Hoppe Hour with Ryan Hoppe Which can be heard by searching Hoppe Radio This podcast network is going to take over the world It is everything that radio is missing Now you're hearing my voice and you go, how can I find it?

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